


Sunrise Over Boreth: In The Company of Augments

by BlueTribble



Series: Sunrise Over Boreth [1]
Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Long Shot, M/M, Romance, Series, Unplanned Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-05-29
Updated: 2016-08-03
Packaged: 2018-01-27 01:45:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 22
Words: 39,535
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1710470
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlueTribble/pseuds/BlueTribble
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Woken from cryosleep by the new head of Section 31, Khan finds himself the unexpected recipient of a new lease on life.  The opportunity does not come without its own challenges, however, and Khan must square with the ghosts of his past before he can fully embrace the hope of a new future.  Meanwhile on the Enterprise, Jim crosses lines he never thought he'd cross again, with unanticipated results.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

He was cold.  Too cold to shiver, and some half-formed memory told him that that was a bad thing.  And then he realized that he was _conscious_ and what that must mean.  He flailed his arms trying to sit up, eyes wide open and blind to his surroundings.  He hit glass and metal instead of open air, and a rush of panic overtook him.  It wasn’t supposed to happen like this.  Something was _wrong_.

 

An interminable moment of struggle later, the cryotube lid was lifted away and a hand pressed down on his chest.  The level of force was more reassuring than restraining.  “You’re alright, son,” an older man’s voice told him, and Khan paused in his struggles to try and ascertain if he’d ever heard it before.  “You’re safe.  No one’s going to hurt you.  Just relax.  We’re going to get you out of this tube and warm you up.”

 

Khan had the good sense to lay back and control his urge to fight and flee like a wounded animal.  Whatever truth or falsehood was in the man’s words, Khan knew that he was vulnerable.  He was disoriented, he was weak, and he had many questions and not nearly enough answers.

 

Suddenly, there were several sets of hands lifting him.   Even with the warning, it was jarring, though in fact it was a quick and efficient transfer to a biobed.  He could hear the beeping of the sensors as they came online and the sounds of equipment moving around him.  He could pick out four distinct voices among the medical crew.  Four plus one.  It must be a large room they were in.

 

He closed his eyes and opened them again, but his vision was still distressingly blurry.  A temporary side-effect, he knew, but still unsettling.  He could make out shapes of people and was strangely reassured to find that one of them was a blob of blue with vague antennae on its head.  Andorian.  Federation.  He wondered how much time had passed.

 

He felt them roll him enough to remove the backboard, then he was covered with a blanket.  It was heavy and soft and fresh from the warmer, the heat enveloping him like paradise and relaxing him in spite of his general state of agitation.  He closed his eyes once more and waited for the shivering to begin.  Shivering was good.  Shivering meant he was trying to warm up.

 

“Clear the room,” the man in charge said after a long while.  Khan had wondered where he’d gotten off to.  “You can monitor his progress remotely.  I need a minute alone with him.”

 

“Of course, sir.”  The sound of instruments being laid aside, footsteps, and the swish of a door told Khan that the med team had left.  All but the man.  Khan heard him settle into a chair somewhere to his left with a soft sound of discomfort.

 

“Who are you?” Khan asked when no announcement of purpose was forthcoming.

 

“Admiral Christopher Pike, late of the _U.S.S. Enterprise_ ,” the man answered.  The name was familiar to Khan.  Captain Kirk’s ‘friend’ — obviously an understatement, and obviously misplaced if the man were alive when Khan had safely assumed he’d been killed at Daystrom.  But it also meant that he couldn’t have been in cryo for very long.

 

“What do you want with me?” he asked, skipping the pleasantries in favor of getting to the point.

 

“That, Mr. Singh, is entirely negotiable,” Pike responded.  “Rest first.  We’ll talk business when you’ve had sleep and a shower and a meal.  Unlike my predecessor, I don’t believe in the brute-force-intimidation method of negotiation.  I promise all your questions will be answered once you’re recovered.  In the meantime, my people are prepping several of your crew for revival.  We didn’t want to start until you were able to be part of the process.”

 

Khan knew the taste of hope.  He also knew the taste of betrayal.  “My crew are dead,” he spat.

 

“No,” Pike insisted quietly.  “You were deceived.  Commander Spock had the cryotubes removed from your torpedoes before you beamed them on board the _Vengeance_.  You’ve been in cryosleep right beside them for almost a year.”

 

That was another question answered.  But it made Khan suspicious.  Why was this man being so accommodating?  On the other hand, it made Pike a long shot better than Alexander Marcus.  And if what he was saying were true, then it would benefit Khan greatly to cooperate with him.  Hope bloomed despite certain knowledge that his crew had died in their sleep and by his own arrogance.  He had no reason to trust this admiral.  He didn’t trust his own responses.  And yet, he wanted to trust the man.

 

“You can offer me no assurance that you’re telling me the truth, Admiral,” he observed after a quiet moment.  “Why should I believe what you’re saying?”

 

“Because I can take you to them when you’re recovered enough to appreciate the gesture,” Pike replied.  “I know you’ve been lied to, manipulated, driven to desperate acts.  I’m sorry for that.  But Section 31 is under new management.  And I do things a bit differently.”  He reached over and patted Khan’s hand where it lay beneath the blanket, then got to his feet.  “Get some rest, Mr. Singh.  You’ve been through a lot.  We’ve got some things to discuss, but I promise it can all wait till you’re recovered.”

 

Khan took a slow breath and nodded reluctantly.  Loathe though he was to admit it, the admiral was right.  Khan needed time to rest before he addressed the particulars of his revival and the terms under which his crew would be returned to him — if indeed they were alive at all.  “Very well.”

 

“If you need anything, you’ve got a dedicated nurse on call, so just give them a ring.  I’ll have them call me if you’re ready to talk and I’m not here.”

 

It was a courtesy he’d not expected.  None of this was what he’d expected, though what expectations he’d had had been vague and ominous.  “Thank you,” he answered.  He felt rather than saw the other man’s smile.

 

“Rest well, Mr Singh.”  He heard uneven footsteps and the tap of a cane on the tile as the man made his way out.  It piqued Khan’s curiosity, but not enough to keep him awake.  Revival had taken a lot out of him — one of the few things that could — and he knew he would sleep for a while before he felt rejuvenated.

 

Sleep took him by surprise, almost unwillingly.  He did not dream.


	2. Chapter 2

When Khan woke again, it was with clear vision and the smell of curry in his nostrils.  He sat up as the door swished open and an Andorian woman in Starfleet scrubs walked into the room.  "Good afternoon, Mr. Singh," she greeted as she set a large tray on the side table.  "Is there anything I can help you with?"

 

"No," he answered, though he could immediately identify half a dozen questions he wanted answers to.  Where was the admiral?  Where were his people?  When could he see them?

 

"Admiral Pike is in the consultation room, if you'd like to speak with him," she offered as if reading his mind.  He supposed it was a natural enough place to begin.  He nodded an acknowledgement, mulling over the prospect of another conversation with the man.  He did not want his disadvantage exploited in the way it had been once before.  He was a man newly awoken from cryosleep, and his crew was once again being used as a bargaining chip.  It was not a position he liked to be in.  And yet the circumstances were very different than they had been before.

 

"Thank you," he said belatedly, and the officer took it for the dismissal it was.  The door swished closed after her, and Khan threw the covers back and got out of bed to stretch.  He was wearing the same off-duty blacks he'd been put into cryosleep in, and he very much wanted out of them.

 

The lav was easy to find; it was the only other door in the well-appointed hospital room.  A change of clothes lay folded and waiting for him next to the basin, and not a uniform but a kurta shalwar in rich burgundy.  It made him feel at once more wary and more at ease about getting on with whatever this admiral wanted.  At least the man assigned him the proper cultural context.

 

He relieved himself and undressed, then stepped into the shower, setting the sonics to something invigorating and turning the water on as well for extra luxury.  The shampoo smelled of champa and the soap of sandalwood.  For a man who wasn't practicing psychological warfare, Admiral Pike had certainly made sure that Khan had all the comforts of home at his disposal.  A worthy adversary indeed, Khan decided with a hint of a smirk.  That was something worth looking forward to.  He took his time in the shower, then dried himself off and dressed and stepped back into the main room to investigate the food.

 

Lunch was tandoori chicken with rice and mattar paneer.  It smelled like somebody's Punjabi grandmother had just whipped it up, or perhaps Khan was just starved for a home-cooked meal.  He took his time enjoying it.  The last thing he was going to do was rush through it and give the admiral the satisfaction of knowing he had captured Khan's interest.

 

Which he had.  He was a dead man who was very much alive.  He was the new head of Section 31.  He seemed accommodating, and he alleged to have Khan’s people safe and sound and ready to be revived.  But more than that, his very presence seemed markedly different from that of Alexander Marcus.  He seemed … less of an overt threat, though Khan knew very well that appearances could be deceiving.

 

But he supposed the time had come to investigate further.  He set his tray aside and moved on slippered feet to the door, gratified that it opened for him.  Beyond the door was a large nurse’s station.  He could see several other rooms across the way and wondered who occupied them.  It hadn’t escaped his notice that there wasn’t a single window on the ward.  Maybe they were in space.  Maybe they were underground.  Whichever it was, the ward was as secure as it was luxurious.

 

A nurse pointed him in the direction of the consultation room, and Khan made his way there with the affectation of ease and a sense of anxiety that increased at every footfall.  Were his people truly alive?  Was it possible?

 

The door opened before him to reveal a pair of sofas and a low table before a large window with a view of the skyscape beyond.  Not underground then.  Potted plants adorned the area, and it lacked the antiseptic smell of the rest of the ward.  Admiral Pike sat with his back to the window, evidently signing documents on the padd in his hand.  A cane leaned against the arm of the sofa.  He looked up when the door hissed open, smiling to see the Augment there.

 

"Mr. Singh," he greeted, and he set his padd aside.

 

"Admiral Pike," Khan returned the greeting, and he stepped inside, waiting until the door closed behind him to speak.  "You said you were preparing my crew for revival."  He wasn't much for small-talk.  Not about this.

 

"That's correct," Pike replied.  “We’ve reverse-engineered the necessary sequencing.  We can begin waking them up when you're ready."

 

"And what am I expected to do in payment for this kindness?"   Nothing came without a price-tag.  He knew that all too well.

 

"I'm not reviving them to coerce you," Pike told him.  "I'm doing it because it's the right thing to do."

 

"They're war criminals."

 

"According to some."

 

Khan gave Pike a distrustful look.  "Don't toy with me.”

 

"I'm not," Pike assured him.  "The historical record we have for the time of the Eugenics Wars is sketchy, but it does cast doubt on the validity of the tribunal that convicted you.  For starters, it was a blanket conviction.  I've found no trace of any evidence that might've corroborated individual allegations of war crimes made against you and your people.  There's plenty for other Augments in other places, but nothing against you.  The whole thing looks like a witch-hunt to me."

 

"It was a witch-hunt," Khan replied quietly.  He didn't like to think of those fatal last weeks before they fled for space.  It felt too much like failure and tasted too much like shame.  "You could've revived them and not revived me," he said then.  "You chose not to.  So the question remains, what do you want with me?"

 

"That's a simple question with a complicated answer," Pike told him.  "Historical allegations aside, what we can prove about your recent actions is damning to say the least.  What you've done is so heinous that we don't have an adequate punishment for it.  Putting you back in cryo was seen as the safest and most humane way of dealing with a problem that no one knew how to deal with."

 

”And now you've taken me out of cryo," Khan pointed out.  "Why?"

 

"Because two wrongs don't make a right.  We could leave you in a cryotube and neglect you until it failed, whether that be years or decades or centuries from now.  It would be an effortless and convenient solution.  Or we could stand and face the real problem, which is neither effortless nor convenient.  So here you are.  You're, what, twenty-seven?  Twenty-eight?  Experientially, I mean."

 

Khan blinked.  It was an unexpected question.  It caught him off-guard, which was both frightening and intriguing.  "Twenty-seven sounds about right," he replied after a moment.  Without an exact date, he couldn’t give a precise answer.

 

"You're young,” Pike said.  “You've got your entire life ahead of you.  And you're brilliant.  You've got a lot to offer the world.  It was wrong of you to kill people and destroy property, and I'm not making light of what you did, but it's wrong of us to not give you the opportunity to come back from that.  The question is, do you even want that opportunity?"

 

Whatever he’d expected, this most certainly was not it.  He wanted to rail against it simply because it was unexpected.  But the admiral was right when he spoke of opportunity.  And opportunity knocked but once.  "I suppose it would depend on the alternative,” he answered, trying for reasonable and feeling more like he’d ended up with something wary.

 

"Inprisonment for the rest of your natural life," Pike responded.  "You'd start out in solitary and maybe end up in a high-security penal settlement.  You wouldn't be left to rot, but your freedoms would be seriously curtailed."

 

"And this opportunity," Khan asked slowly, "what would it entail?"

 

"A lifetime of service to the Federation in the employ of Section 31.  I can think of no better reparation for your actions than to serve the very people that you once tried to destroy."

 

"I doubt Starfleet would feel the same."

 

"That's why you'd be working with me.  Section 31 is my command now, and with that comes a certain amount of leverage.  You're familiar with the sort of operations that Section 31 is involved in.  You'd be a valuable asset.  You'd help a lot of people."

 

Khan’s lips quirked.  ”I didn't realize that the Federation's secret intelligence service was in the business of helping people," he remarked.

 

"Yeah, well, that is its ultimate aim.  Hard to see sometimes with some of the things it's involved in.  Extreme measures against extreme threats.  It's not something I believe in, but it is something I see the value of."  Pike gestured to the sofa perpendicular to him.  "Please, sit.  If we're going to talk business, you could at least be comfortable."

 

Khan moved to the sofa then, easing himself down onto it and studying Pike with keen eyes.  The man in front of him was in his prime, rugged and fit though clearly age and injury had taken their toll.  Sharp gray eyes spoke of intelligence and wit.  ”You're not the man Marcus was," he ventured.

 

"No," the admiral agreed.  "I'm not.  I understood his point of view.  But I can't say I approved of his methods."

 

"You knew him then."

 

"He was my mentor.  He talked me into applying to the Academy when I was dead set against anything Starfleet.  But that doesn't mean I didn't see his flaws or disagree with him.  I think the outcome for everyone would've been a great deal better if he'd chosen a different strategy in dealing with you.”

 

"He feared us," Khan told him.  "From the moment he realized who we were, he feared us, and that fear drove his decisions.”

 

"Are you saying he was wrong to fear you?" Pike asked astutely.  "History tells us that you were both the most brilliant and the most successful of the Augment warlords of the late 20th Century.  The very best of tyrants, you're called, and rightly so.  Your regime spanned almost half the planet, putting you alongside some of the greatest conquerors in human memory.  And yet where other Augments were conducting campaigns of genocide, slavery, and forced eugenic breeding, your lands were fairly peaceful.  Strictly policed, naturally, but peaceful.  The only wars you fought were defensive, and you did go to war, it was for the good of Augment and Human alike."

 

Khan was grinning a Cheshire-cat smile, clearly proud of his accomplishments.  And proud of the fact that someone had taken the time to educate himself about them.  “That was a long time ago," the Augment reminded him, demurring even though he would rather discuss his successes, short-lived as they were.

 

"Not for you," Pike pointed out.  "Earth hasn't known war or poverty for generations, but the vast majority of your life was influenced by just those things."

 

"Some would say that's an advantage," Khan replied.  "I'm capable of great and terrible things, the likes of which humanity hasn't seen since the last of the World Wars.  It’s why Marcus needed me.”

 

"You are a warrior," the admiral agreed unequivocally.  "But you've been in survival mode for so long that you've lost your self-restraint."

 

Khan's expression changed then from one of growing respect to one of defensive anger.  "You know nothing of what I've endured," he shot back.  "Don't make the mistake of patronizing me."

 

"I'm not patronizing you," Pike responded evenly.  "I'm observing a flaw in your behavior.  You lash out in anger like an undisciplined child.  If someone wrongs you, you think of revenge first and deny the long-standing consequences of your actions.  You're thinking with a very small mind.  And it will be the end of you if you don't stop."

 

The resulting look was one that Pike had seen before.  Hurt.  Shame.  Anger.  And a defiance that had only one purpose.

 

"You want to prove me wrong," Pike divined.  "That's good.  I want you to prove me wrong.  I want you to prove to me that you're more than the sum of your biology and your schooling.  You're better than what you've become, and you know it.  So rise up.  Be glorious.  But know that doing that is going to be one of the hardest things you've ever done, and I'm well aware of what you've accomplished when I say that.  Join me at Section 31.  You'll have a life and a future.  It may not be what you once envisioned, but it's a hell of a lot better than cryo or solitary."

 

Khan looked at him for a long moment before he found the words he wanted.  "Why are you doing this?"

 

"I knew a kid like you once.  Brilliant.  Ambitious.  Charismatic.  He was picking up cadets in a bar in Iowa, got his ass handed to him in a fight.  Now he's captain of the Enterprise.  I didn't do much for him, not really.  Gave him an ear when he needed it, a kick in the ass, a few pointers here and there.  Other than that, he achieved greatness on his own terms.  Now, he's screwed up a time or two, I'm not saying he's perfect, but he lives with the consequences of his actions just like everyone else.  Just like you, if you're up to the challenge."

 

"You think I'm like James Kirk.”

 

"I _know_ you're like James Kirk," Pike corrected him.  "You're meant to contribute meaningfully, to make the world a better place.  It's what you were created for.  But you can't make yourself king of everything.  It doesn't work that way.  Real success is a team effort.  Sometimes you lead, sometimes you follow.  You're not always going to be on top.  But if you can muster half the strength of will that you did trying to save your people, then you'll go far no matter what you set your mind to.  I'll give you some time to think things over.  This isn't a decision you should make lightly."

 

"But it's the decision you think I should make," Khan pointed out.

 

"Starfleet has the reputation of being a clean slate for those who need one.  A lot of convicts serve their time in a penal settlement and then distinguish themselves in the 'Fleet when it's all over.  In your case, we're skipping the penal settlement in favor of some dangerous operations where your expertise would be valuable.  Considering the nature of your crimes, I'd say it's pretty equitable."

 

"And when you say 'a lifetime of service', how long is that?" he asked.  "I was created to live 200 years or more."

 

"And a human life-span these days is about 150," Pike replied.  "I'd say as long as you're capable of doing the work, you'll be working.  That's not to say you won't have time off or the opportunity to pursue your own interests.  I'm not a slave-driver.  But I'd expect at least 50 years out of you.  This is a long-term gig."

 

Khan nodded, thinking that over.  It was a generous offer, all things considered.  He could reasonably retire at a hundred and still have a century to himself, provided he didn't die in the line of duty.  "And what would my limitations be?" he asked then.  He couldn't imagine that a deal this sweet didn't come with limitations.

 

"You'll start out under house arrest," the admiral told him.  "Your movements would be monitored, your visits supervised, your excursions away from home performed under escort.  In time, those limitations will be renegotiated."

 

Khan thought that over.  It was better than a slab in a brig somewhere, that was certain.  And it implied he'd be allowed a certain array of personal possessions.  "I suppose all of my belongings have been confiscated as evidence," he mused aloud.

 

Pike chuckled.  "I'm already working on getting them released," he assured the other man.  "I thought you might like having your own clothes again."

 

Khan smiled softly at that.  "They are a comfort, yes," he agreed.  "Thank you, by the way," he continued, gesturing to the kurta shalwar he wore.

 

"I thought a little bit of home might make you feel more settled," the admiral accepted by way of explanation.

 

"I did not expect kindness," he admitted quietly.  He knew now that kindness was what it was.

 

"I'm not Alex Marcus," Pike told him.  "I'm your ally, not your adversary."

 

"Why?" Khan asked.

 

"Because hate never solved anything.  Now tell me the truth, Khan.  Do you have any sort of remorse for what you did?"

 

He knew it was a test.  And he knew somehow that this man would know if he lied.  And the truth of the matter was, he did regret some of what he had done.  Not really for the archive, and only a little bit for the conference room, but a great deal for the _Vengeance_ and San Francisco -- especially now that he knew his people were alive.

 

He nodded at last in response, but he had a suspicion that Pike could already see the answer he wanted on Khan's face.  "Too many lives," he murmured.  "So much destruction for so little progress.  It wasn't worth it."  And yet he didn't know what the alternative could have been.  He didn't know what he should've done instead.

 

"And that, son," Pike told him softly, "is the reason you're getting a second chance.  You remember that when things start getting tough."

 

Khan didn't want to trust Pike.  He had trusted a Starfleet admiral once before and gotten nothing for his hard work, faith, and patience.  But unlike Marcus, Pike seemed genuine, and that was what won Khan over despite all rational objections.  He wondered why the man was so willing to help him.  This couldn't be a popular decision.  In fact, Khan could safely assume that Pike would be throwing his weight around quite a bit defending his course of action -- and not just about Khan but about the other Augments as well.

 

"Why are you doing this?" he asked again.

 

"Why do you think I'm doing this?" the man asked in return.

 

"You're familiar with the Eugenics Wars as a historical event," he answered, "and therefore familiar with my policies and what it reveals about me as a leader.  You also seem to be familiar with the time and the circumstances under which I worked for Section 31.  You find them disagreeable, as any officer of good moral character would.  And yet you find yourself at the head of an organization whose very existence flies in the face of what Starfleet supposedly stands for.  You have on at least one occasion recruited an individual of great potential and poor circumstances, and the return on that investment has been substantial.  For whatever reason, Admiral, you believe I'm worth saving, which is more credit than most people would give me."

 

"I do believe you're worth saving," Pike answered.  "You've got a lot to offer the world.  The Federation could benefit from your insight.  But you could benefit from the our insight as well.  It's not a one-way street.  You're going to find your ideas challenged at times, and that's going to be difficult for you.  Sometimes you're wrong, sometimes your actions aren't justified, sometimes the best idea comes from the idiot across the table.  That's life.  Just roll with the punches and keep on going.  Think you can do that?"

 

Khan pursed his lips.  On one hand, he felt like he was being coddled.  On the other, he felt like he was being respected.  It was a disorienting change of pace for him.  But he liked Pike, he decided.  The man had yet to promise him anything outlandish and he was open about the challenges inherent in the promises he did make.  He knew where he stood with Pike, which was a huge difference from his interactions with Marcus.

 

"Yes," he replied at last.  "I believe I can.  But I’d still like some time before I make a final decision.”

 

“Fair enough,” Pike agreed.  “Now then, let’s go for a walk.  You can see your people and we can discuss the next steps in the process.”


	3. Chapter 3

Admiral Pike led Khan back out into the main corridor, and from there across the ward.  The man favored his right leg with a cane on that side, though the Augment could read in the man’s posture that there was something amiss with his left shoulder as well.  He filed that away for future rumination and returned his focus to the present moment and the prospect of seeing at least one of his people.

 

Pike stopped at a door and keyed a code into an access panel.  The door opened, and Khan caught a glimpse of the foot ends of two cryopods laying on biobeds.  His heart skipped a beat.  Pike shifted to one side and Khan took the opportunity to step inside the room and get a better look.  Yes.  They _were_ his cryopods, still functioning and with a live body in each of them.  Joaquin Weiss and Suzette Ling.  He’d know their faces anywhere.

 

He hadn’t expected the depth of emotion that welled up inside of him as he reached out and touched Joaquin’s cryopod.  The last time he’d been this close to any of his people — to say nothing of two of his dearest friends — had been when he’d smuggled them into torpedoes.  Now it was all he could do to keep his breathing steady and his eyes dry.

 

“There are six others on the ward,” Pike told him quietly, evidently sensing a need to politely distract the other man.  “I thought it would be better to revive them in small groups.  That way there’s a manageable number to deal with at any given time.”

 

Khan nodded silently, his hand still on Joaquin’s cryopod.  This was really going to happen, he realized.  His family were finally being returned to him.  He knew then that he’d go to work for Section 31 and willingly.  Anything in payment for the lives of his people.  Part of him still argued that this could all be a trick and that nothing was certain until his crew were safely revived and allowed to move freely.  But for the moment, he was willing to rely on the hope that Admiral Pike was a man of his word.  He certainly seemed to be thus far.

 

“When can they be revived?” he asked at last.

 

“As soon as you’re ready,” Pike answered.  “The med team’s on stand-by.”

 

Khan nodded.  “As soon as possible, then,” he requested, amazed that he was being given such a degree of choice in the matter.  He wondered once again what the kindness would cost him later, but for the moment he was willing to pay the price.

 

The admiral stepped out of the room.  Khan heard the tap of his cane stop several feet down the corridor and presumed he’d gone to the nurse’s station to issue orders.  It could have just as easily been done over the comm, but this way it gave Khan a moment alone with his two friends.  His lover and his confidante.

 

They had been through a lot together, he and Joaquin.  They had saved each other’s lives more than once.  And while they’d said their goodbyes before they’d put themselves to sleep on the _Botany Bay_ , he still meant a great deal to Khan.  And Suzette?  How many times had she been good counsel to him when he’d needed it?  Too many times to count, he knew.  But Khan was glad that Joaquin and Suzette would be the first to wake up after their long sleep.

 

“Soon,” he murmured to the cryopod.  He patted the cold metal, then turned to do the same to the other cryopod.  Then he made his way out to join Admiral Pike.  “Where are the others?” he asked.

 

Pike pointed out the three next rooms in the corridor.  “I can let you in to see them if you like,” he offered, but Khan shook his head.

 

“I’ll see them soon enough,” he replied.  He paused then, studying the man for a long moment.

 

The admiral patiently endured his scrutiny before finally asking, “Something on your mind, Mr. Singh?”

 

“On Qo’noS, Captain Kirk accepted my surrender on your behalf.  He then proceeded to punch me until he couldn’t raise his arm anymore.”

 

Pike huffed a soft laugh.  “Sounds like something he’d do.”  But he read the unasked question in the words.  “He and I were both at Daystrom the night you attacked, I as captain of the _Enterprise_ and he as my first officer.  When he assumed command of the ship, it was with the well-founded understanding that I was dead.  In point of fact, I did die, but the medics kept working on me until I came back.”  He smiled sadly then.  “But that’s a long story and no one comes out looking good in the end.”

 

“He doesn’t know,” Khan divined quietly.

 

“No,” Pike answered solemnly.  “He doesn’t.”

 

~~~~~~~~~

 

Jim woke slowly, lulled out of sleep by the ache of bruises and the warmth of the body next to him.  For a moment — a brief moment — he thought they were back in the forest.  But no, forests didn’t come equipped with beds and blankets.  They were home on the _Enterprise_.

 

“You know,” Carol murmured into his ear, “we’re really going to have to talk about this at some point.”

 

He turned his head and snuggled closer.  “Tomorrow’s another day.”  He didn’t want to talk about it now.  Talking would mean taking responsibility, and he wasn’t ready for that just yet.  And neither, it would seem, was his lover.  She didn’t press the issue but instead wrapped an arm around him, cradling his head close to her breast.

 

“What happens when tomorrow comes?” she asked after a long while.

 

“We shower and dress and have breakfast and worry about the rest of it after our shift is over,” he replied.  There was no point in starting off the day on the wrong foot.  They could have the inevitable conversation later.  By that time, they’d both have a better idea about what they wanted to say.

 

“And what if I wanted to worry about at least part of it over breakfast?”

 

“That depends,” he replied.  “Is it going to make for a long and uncomfortable shift?”

 

She smiled softly.  “I certainly hope not,” she answered warmly, and she ran her fingers through his hair.

 

“Then we’ll worry about some of it over breakfast,” he conceded.  There was no arguing with her about these things.  Better to just modify his plans now and get it over with.

 

Not that he anticipated a prickly or dramatic conversation.  Not with Carol.  If that was going to happen, it would’ve happened on the planet.  But no.  They’d been tap-dancing around this for months.  It was probably a good thing that they’d fallen into bed together before the rest of the crew had to suffer the ill effects of their unresolved sexual tension.

 

He felt her press a kiss into his hair then, and he returned it with a brush of his own lips against her skin.  “We have some time before tomorrow,” she pointed out with invitation in her tone, and he lifted his head to brush another kiss along the column of her neck.

 

“We do,” he agreed with a low purr.


	4. Chapter 4

Khan stood alone in the hospital room, looking at the cryotubes that held Joaquin and Suzette.  In a few minutes, the med team would begin the revival process.  This was his last chance to collect his thoughts before chaos erupted once more.

 

He was anxious.  He understood it and accepted it, but it left him unsettled all the same.  Every heartbeat brought his people — and his past — closer to him.  Always before, he’d been able to ignore the reasons why they’d ended up in a sleeper ship in space in favor of whatever crisis occupied the present moment.  But with the prospect of being reunited with his family finally a tangible reality, the demons of the past were catching up to him.  Regardless of the victories he’d won in the Eugenics Wars, there had been more failures, and they weighed on him now that the people who’d followed him, who’d bled for him, were about to be awakened.

 

It was easy enough to put the past in the past.  The Eugenics Wars happened over two centuries ago.  The combatants were dead and gone and his present context was totally different from what it had been in the late 20th Century.  What was more difficult to square with were the decisions he’d made, the strategies he’d used.  Those spoke of character defects that he didn’t like to examine.

 

Pike was correct, he grudgingly accepted.  He’d been in survival mode for so long that he’d lost his self-restraint.  What he was coming to realize was that it had all started long before Admiral Marcus had revived him.

 

“You look pensive,” came Pike’s voice from the doorway, jolting him out of his thoughts.  “What’s on your mind?”

 

“I wasn’t aware that counseling was part of an admiral’s duties,” Khan replied, though he did turn to look at the man, hiding his troubles behind a collected front.  He might trust Pike to make good on his word, but he wasn’t sure he trusted the man enough to let him see him bleed.

 

“Any command officer picks up a few extra skills along the way,” Pike responded with a bit of a smile, and he stepped into the room, letting the door slide closed behind him.  “I figured the time would come when you needed an ear.  I thought I’d offer one.”

 

Khan considered his options, then decided that it couldn’t hurt much to continue this conversation.  And if it did, well, it would only hurt him.  Strange as it was, his people were safe for the moment.  “Fleeing Earth was a forlorn hope,” he began.  “We knew the risks, the probabilities.  Twelve of my people died in cryogenic sleep before Marcus found us.  We all reasonably expected to meet the same fate.”

 

“And now your people are about to be revived.”

 

“But to what purpose?” he asked.  “We were bred for leadership, trained for warfare.  You’ve already told me what my sentence is to be.  What about them?”

 

“If they’re anything like you then they’ll adapt and thrive,” Pike told him.  “The rest of it will come in time.  Section 31’s taken responsibility for them so far.  We may as well do so for a while longer.”

 

Khan considered that.  He was hiding his own turmoil behind concern for his people, he knew, but it was better than wallowing in self-loathing.  “I can’t imagine that the Federation is going to grant them citizenship and all the economic privileges that go with it,” he said at last.  “We predate the United Federation of Planets by a century and a half.”

 

“I’ve been thinking about that, actually,” the admiral replied.  “As far as citizenship is concerned, if birthright falls through then there’s always the path of asylum through one of the Federation’s member governments.  You were fleeing persecution on a number of grounds, after all.  Considering the history involved, it would be better to petition Tellar Prime or Andoria rather than Earth, but whatever the case, I’ve got people working on a few options.  A lot of it is going to depend on what each individual wants.  But you have my word that I’m not going to just abandon them.  They’ll have support until they’re able to stand on their own.”

 

Khan nodded.  Everything seemed reasonable.  Too reasonable, considering all he’d done to arrive here.  Or perhaps that was just the paranoia talking.  “How long will I be allowed to stay with them?”  He knew they’d be separated eventually.  He just wanted to prepare himself for the inevitable so he could soften the blow a bit for his crew.

 

“There’s your own health to look after,” Pike told him.  “The doctors will want to keep you another night, probably, just to make certain you’re recovering well from cryo.  After that, I’ve arranged for some quarters for you.  We’ll take some time to get you settled in.  But as long as we’re reviving and orienting your people, you’ll be involved.”

 

Another nod.  “There will be questions,” he murmured at last.

 

“There are always questions.  I figure we’ll deal with little things like sonic showers and food replicators and work our way up to why you’re being treated differently from the rest of them.”

 

That seemed a logical enough plan.  It was enough for Khan to risk bringing up what was really on his mind.  “You seem remarkably well-versed in the period of time surrounding the Eugenics Wars,” he ventured.

 

“Before I enlisted in Starfleet, I was a history teacher,” Pike answered.  “I know how to research.  As cloudy and contradictory as the information we have is, I’ve made a decent survey of it.”  He smiled softly.  “I like to know what I’m getting into.”

 

“You have no idea what you’re getting into,” Khan retorted with a shake of his head, his voice quiet and resigned.

 

“I’d say that puts us in the same boat then,” the admiral observed.

 

It irked Khan that Pike was correct.  It irked him more that he seemed to be so easy to read.  He felt like he had open wounds and the admiral could just look at him and tell which parts were most tender.  Strangely, though, he didn’t seem to be using his observations to his advantage.  Quite the contrary, in fact.  The man seemed to be doing everything possible to give Khan security and dignity.  It ran completely counter to everything Khan had experienced with Admiral Marcus, and he couldn’t even say whether he preferred this situation to that.  It was all very unsettling.  He didn’t like feeling unsettled.  And yet, he had no reason to reject the gestures that Pike was offering.  Rationality and courtesy far outweighed his visceral reluctance on the matter.

 

“I can’t say how my people will react to the 23rd Century,” he responded after a long moment.  “What they left behind will be on their minds.”  Just as it was on his mind.

 

“I’ve been thinking about that as well,” Pike said then, his tone turning thoughtful.  “Are you familiar with the Truth and Reconciliation Commission of 1995?”

 

“A restorative justice body assembled after the abolition of the South African apartheid regime.”  He remembered it being a very progressive move and credited superior thinking for its success.  It had given him hope — by that time it was obvious that the purpose for which the Augments had been created would never be fulfilled — that humanity was capable of bettering itself without Augment help.

 

“Perhaps something similar could be adopted in this case,” the admiral told him.  “There’s so little we know about the Eugenics Wars and the events that led up to them.  It would benefit everyone to have a clearer understanding of that time — not just the politics and who did what to whom but the experience of the Augments involved.  Your story is part of the story of humanity.  We should preserve that.”

 

“It would change your understanding of history,” Khan pointed out.  Some things needed to remain in the past, forgotten or reinterpreted.  He liked his legacy much better the way it was remembered than the way it actually happened.

 

“History changes every day,” Pike argued.  “We’re always finding something new that revises the story.”

 

Khan pressed his lips together.  “We were young,” he said then.  “We were arrogant.  We made stupid mistakes because we were arrogant.”  He more than most, but then he’d been in charge of his contingent of Augments.

 

“Such is life.  You’re older now.  You’re wiser.  The mistakes of the past don’t have to influence the present, especially when the past is over two centuries ago.  This is a fresh start for all of you.”

 

“Is it, though?  You can’t hide us under the wing of Section 31 forever.  People are going to find out that seventy-three Augments from the 20th Century are alive and well.  The natural state of information is to want to be free.”

 

“And when we come to that bridge, we’ll cross it.  One step at a time.  Right now, we have a couple of people to revive and orient.  From there, we’ll get a game plan about the others.  After that, we’ll start worrying more closely about the earth-shattering consequences and how we’re going to address them.  But don’t think you’re alone in this.  You’re not.  And neither are your people.”

 

Khan looked to the cryotubes again, and he took a breath.  “As you say,” he agreed quietly.

 

“We’re ready when you are,” Pike offered.

 

A ghost of a smile crossed Khan’s lips.  “I’m ready,” he replied.


	5. Chapter 5

They started with Joaquin.  Once the cryotube was hard-wired to the monitors and programmed with the individualized revival sequencing, it was a waiting game while the process took its course.  Oddly enough, Khan could deal with waiting now that something was actually _happening_.  The hum of the cryotube was soothing to his nerves.  It told him that everything was functioning normally.  The viewscreen on the wall displayed heart rate, respiration, brain activity, core temperature.  He watched as the numbers slowly increased and periodically glanced in the direction of the med team as they prepared Su’s cryotube for the same procedure.  Soon.  The word kept repeating itself in his mind.

 

_Beep._

 

He wondered what was going on on the other side of the glass.  Wakeup dreams were a well-known side-effect of cryogenic sleep.  The brain processed the physical stimuli of the revival sequencing as dreamlike in nature, though the experience wasn’t always pleasant.  Khan’s own experiences had bordered on uncomfortable.  He didn’t much care for the sensation of being locked inside his own skin.  Both times he’d been woken, he’d fought to regain control of his body as quickly as possible.  And the second time had come with the added panic of being trapped in a confined space.  It wasn’t always a good thing to spring back to consciousness so quickly.

 

 _Beep_.

 

He thought back to the last night he’d spent with Joaquin.  They’d napped in two-hour shifts in the cockpit of the _Botany Bay_ while his people had finished the final preparations for launch.  Their last meal had been field rations from the emergency stockpile.  They’d watched the sun rise before firing the liftoff rockets and said their goodbyes in the forward sleeper compartment.  Khan had put Joaquin to sleep himself, leaving the ship’s computer to do the honors for his own cryotube.

 

And now he’d be the one to wake him up.  Somehow it seemed wrong.  They hadn’t expected a reunion.

 

_Beep._

 

“Brain activity coming out of coma range,” one of the nurses reported.

 

“Status of Ms. Ling?” Admiral Pike asked from his position in the corner, politely out of the way of the medical staff whereas Khan had plunked himself down between the two tubes, right in the middle of the action.

 

“Starting the revival sequence now, sir,” someone answered him.

 

There was nothing to do but wait.

 

Khan turned back to Joaquin’s cryotube.  Color had returned to his friend’s face and he could see his eyes moving beneath closed lids.  REM sleep.  It wouldn’t be long now.

 

After a few more minutes, the latches on the cryotube released and the nurses lifted it up and away.  Joaquin’s eyes were open, but Khan knew he couldn’t see yet.  “You’re safe, my friend,” he told him, unable to hide the smile in his voice.  “Just relax.  Let the medical staff take care of you.”

 

“Khan…  Where are we?”  Joaquin’s voice was quiet but a distinct Israeli accent was detectible.

 

“Earth, in the 23rd Century,” he replied readily.  “It’s a long story.  I promise I’ll tell it to you it in due time.”  He glanced briefly at Admiral Pike before adding, “But we’re among friends, Joaquin, at least for the moment.”  It was quite a statement considering his tumultuous thoughts on the matter.  But he wanted to reassure Joaquin, who was nothing if not overprotective.  He shifted away to let the medical staff lift the backboard and transfer the newly woken Augment from the cryotube to the biobed, then helped put a blanket over him and squeezed his friend’s hand.

 

“Where are the others?”  Joaquin squeezed the hand in return, though it his body was wracked with shivers.

 

“Awaiting revival.  You and Su are the first.  We’ll wake more after the two of you are rested and oriented.  I’ll need your help with them.”

 

“Of course, my Khan.”

 

Khan smiled wistfully at Joaquin’s words.  The endearment that had become a title.  It was bittersweet, hearing it again.  It brought many things to mind: power, pleasure, shame, defeat.  But he accepted it in the spirit with which it was intended.  “Rest,” he instructed.  “You’ve got a great deal ahead of you.”  He squeezed Joaquin’s hand again and remained with him until Su’s cryopod unlatched.

 

The process of moving and warming was repeated with Su, who woke only briefly.  “Is she alright…?” she asked in a broad Louisiana accent as one hand shifted blindly to her abdomen.

 

“Is who alright?” Khan asked her gently, though his lightning-fast mind had already deduced the answer.

 

“My baby…”

 

Khan reached out and stroked her hair, even as he glanced up to the medical staff, who were themselves reaching for medical scanners and data padds.  “It’s too soon to say, Su,” he replied for them.  “Get some rest.  We’ll know more in a little while.”

 

She seemed too exhausted to be insistent.  She gave a small nod, and a moment later she was asleep again.

 

“Talla,” came the doctor’s voice from behind Khan, “fix her up with a hypo of HCG and progesterone.”

 

Khan tucked the blanket a bit tighter around Su’s body.  “Cryogenic sleep was neither designed nor tested on pregnant subjects,” he pronounced simply.

 

“Then we’ll do what we can and hope for the best,” the man replied.  “Did you know about this?” he asked after a moment.

 

“No,” Khan replied honestly, “but it wouldn’t have made much of a difference if I had.  We were running for our lives.”

 

“I understand.”  There was something in the man’s tone that gave Khan the inkling that he really _did_ understand those sorts of lesser-of-two-evils decisions.  If Su had disclosed her status, she would have risked being left behind, and if she’d been left behind, she would’ve been killed.

 

Admiral Pike’s voice interjected then.  “Let’s get out of the med team’s way and let them do what they do best,” he said.  “We need to take a walk down to the storage bay.  You can tell me who needs to be woken up next.”

 

It was a polite command, and Khan rankled at it, but he knew there was little he could do here besides hold the hands of sleeping people.  His medical expertise was comparatively limited.  It would serve Joaquin and Suzette both to have an undistracted team working on them.  He got to his feet and stepped between a couple of nurses, taking a position behind Pike and a step to his right as they made their way out of the room.

 

He didn’t speak again until they reached the end of the corridor and were waiting on a turbolift.  “Boyce is one of the best.  He worked on Jim after he came out of that warp core.  He’s been my doctor for ages.  If there’s anything to be done, he’ll do it.”

 

“Only time will tell,” Khan replied, though his tone was kind and he was thankful for the gesture of reassurance.  “Thank you, Admiral.”

 

Pike smiled as the doors slid open.  “Call me Chris,” he said, and he stepped inside.


	6. Chapter 6

There was no more procrastinating, Jim acknowledged as he finished his last bite of scrambled eggs.  They’d woken up early enough to have a leisurely shower (together) and a sit-down breakfast, but now they really had to talk.  Uniforms were on.  Duty shifts began in an hour.  It was time.  And as many morning-after conversations as he’d been through in his life, he knew better than to look forward to this.

 

“So,” he began softly.  “You wanted to talk.”

 

She leaned back in her chair and took another sip of her coffee, assessing him for a moment before she spoke.  What was going on behind those startling blue eyes of hers was anyone’s guess.  Jim rather hoped whatever it was was generous in nature.  “What we’ve done is against regulations,” she began at last.  “There’s too great a disparity in our respective ranks.  If people find out about this, there could be trouble for both of us.”

 

Coffee was reassuring right about now.  He took a long drink of his own.  “Isn’t that my line?” he asked jokingly, trying for his own sake to lighten the mood.  “I mean, I am the superior officer.”

 

“And I’m the instigating officer,” she remarked with a bit of a smile.  In point of fact, she had been the one to make the first move back there on the planet.  And on the ship, actually, if they were keeping count.  “I suppose my first question for you is whether you’re alright with that.”

 

“Well, I’m alright with _this_ , so I guess I have to be alright with that,” he answered.  Then his eyes narrowed.  “What, you think I’d write you up for insubordination?”

 

“I think it’s a possibility better addressed than not,” she responded with a shrug and a measure of caution.  They really were in uncharted territory here.  Even if it was a remote possibility given Jim’s nature, it was still a possibility under the right set of circumstances.

 

He pursed his lips for a moment, then set his coffee aside.  “Alright,” he said then.  “I have no problem with what happened.  Personally, I think out of a variety of ways it could’ve happened, it was probably the best scenario, even if it _did_ involve a malfunctioning shuttle and the unanticipated extension of an away mission.  We got to interact as people instead of officers, and that’s what’s important.”

 

“And you wouldn’t mind if it happened again?”

 

“I would love for it to happen again,” he answered without hesitation.  “That’s not the issue.  The issue is whether _this_ can withstand the stress of rank structure and professionalism.”

 

“And can it?”

 

“I don’t know,” he answered honestly.  “The last time I slept with a crewmember under my command it didn’t work out so well.”  And it had been Carol who’d reminded him of that ever so sharply once upon a time.

 

She regarded him for a moment, then asked, “What really happened between you and Christine?”  The tone of her voice had changed.  It was less aloof scientist and more concerned friend.

 

“We agreed to have fun, we had fun, then feelings got involved on her part, which I respected but didn’t sign on for, and I told her as much.”  It sounded pretty callous the way he said it, and it probably was, but it hadn’t been an ideal situation and he’d handled it as best he could.  Jim had broken Christine’s heart, and he knew it, and he’d been a bit abrupt about it, but he hadn’t been dishonest with her.

 

“And what is this?” she asked him then.  “Fun or feelings?”

 

“You already know the answer to that.”  He didn’t want to say it.  She was going to make him say it.  But that didn’t mean he had to enthusiastically embrace the eventuality.

 

“Jim.”  It was the only pressure she applied, and it wasn’t even a lot at that, but damn if it didn’t do the trick.  There was something about the way she said his name that always made him melt a little inside, which was one reason he’d never admit to it aloud.

 

“It’s fun,” he answered grudgingly.  “But it’s not _just_ fun.”  And that was the closest he’d come to admitting that feelings were involved.

 

She reached over the table and put a hand over his, thumb brushing over his knuckles reassuringly.  “So we’re acknowledging feelings on your side and we’re acknowledging feelings on my side.  Sound about right?”

 

He chuckled then.  How did she know how to play him so well?  Womanly intuition, or had she taken lessons from somebody?  “Sounds about right,” he agreed, feeling slightly better about the confession.

 

“And we want to keep doing this.”

 

“I do if you do.”

 

“I do.”  She squeezed his hand, then pulled away.  “So, the real question is, how do we keep the rest of the crew from suspecting it enough to become concerned?”

 

He blinked.  “What, just like that?  No arguing the moral ramifications?  No quoting regulation?”

 

“I grew up in a ‘Fleet family.  I know the regulations as well or better than you do.  And you tend to ignore the rules when they don’t suit you, so it’s hypocritical to be sanctimonious about it.”

 

She was an admiral’s daughter.  And he did play fast and loose with the rules.  He conceded her point with a nod of the head.  “It’s a small ship on a long mission.  The natural state of information is to want to be free.  People are going to find out eventually.”

 

“And when they do, it’s got to be at least nominally within regulations.  So we keep it discreet until I earn a lieutenant-commander’s rank.  And you won’t help that process along no matter how tempted you may be.”

 

“Yes, ma’am,” he agreed readily.  “Anything else?”

 

“If we’re seen coming and going from one another’s quarters too often, people will start asking questions.  It’s human nature.”

 

“So we find a way to not be seen,” he answered.  “There are kilometers of Jefferies tubes on this ship, dozens of service bays, plenty of doors that can be locked with a command override.  We’ll work something out.”

 

“I don’t fancy a shag in a service bay.”

 

“How about a shag in the diplomatic suite?”

 

She smiled at that, mischievous.  “Now _that_ has merit.”

 

They spent the rest of the time dreaming up cozy places for a rendezvous, before Jim’s last-chance-to-get-your-ass-out-of-bed alarm went off and they got to their feet with wry smiles and cleaned off the table.  Carol left him with a lingering kiss and a promise to see him after dinner, and Jim ordered another cup of coffee and headed for the bridge a few minutes later.

 

All in all, it was the best morning-after conversation he’d ever had.


	7. Chapter 7

Khan sat in the room with his two sleeping friends, having made his tour of the storage bay with Admiral Pike and selected the next group of crewmembers to be woken.  It had taken his mind off of the shock of Suzette’s revelation to see the rows of cryotubes firsthand and know that they were all still operational.  The revival process would continue with the six men and women who were already on the ward, but Khan wanted Joaquin and Su to be able to assist in the process.  He couldn’t be everywhere at once, and he wanted each Augment who woke to know that they were safe and among friends.

 

The med team had cleared out of the room some time ago, leaving the two Augments to rest undisturbed.  But Khan couldn’t make himself stay away.  He’d been away for far too long as it was.  At least Admiral Pike seemed to understand his need to be close to his people.  He’d taken his leave for the afternoon with the promise to return if Khan or either of his crew needed him.  But judging from Khan’s own long sleep, it would be some time before Joaquin or Su woke.

 

He’d spent a good long time just watching them, marking the rise and fall of their chests and the flutter of movement beneath their eyelids.  True sleep, no longer frozen in suspended animation.  It was reassuring to him to know they were resting comfortably.  Reassuring enough to relax him into a sleep of his own.  He drifted off on the sofa and didn’t wake again until he felt a hand on his shoulder.

 

“Khan.”  It was Joaquin’s voice, and a moment later there was the shifting of weight beside him on the sofa as the other Augment sat down.  “How long have you been here?”

 

“Ages,” he answered sleepily as he opened his eyes, a hint of Punjabi intonation slipping past his English accent, and he wrapped an arm around his companion.  Joaquin returned the embrace without hesitation, warm and strong even in his tired state.  Khan relaxed into it, finding himself the most content and centered he’d been in a long time.

 

“Your back is not going to forgive easily if you sleep in that manner,” Joaquin pointed out after a long moment, and he shifted to lay on the sofa and pulled Khan after him to stretch out.

 

“Always so attentive to my needs,” Khan murmured with a soft chuckle.  He fit himself against the other man, nestling into his lover’s bulkier form.

 

“Especially where I reap the benefit,” Joaquin assured him, and he dragged a hand through Khan’s dark hair.  “Go back to sleep.”

 

“You should do the same.  You’ve only just woken from cryo.”

 

“I sleep better when you’re with me.”

 

“Fair enough.”  He snuggled closer and closed his eyes once more.  “If you happen to see someone with blue skin, pointed ears, or fur, don’t be alarmed.  Humanity’s a spacefaring civilization.  We’ve made friends.”

 

Joaquin hummed warmly at that.  “Goodnight, Joaquin.  Rest well.  Don’t worry about the aliens.”

 

“I thought you deserved forewarning.”

 

“Always so considerate of my nerves,” he mimicked Khan’s earlier statement.

 

“I just don’t want to get dumped on my arse on the floor in the event you should react with your typical dramatic flair.”

 

“Your vote of confidence is reassuring.”

 

“Go to sleep.”

 

“You first,” Joaquin replied in the same fond tone.

 

Khan melted back into sleep with ease, supremely reassured by the presence of his best friend and bodyguard.  When he woke again, it was because he heard movement in the room.  He opened one eye to see Su on her way back from the lav.

 

“Looks like you two wasted no time lookin’ adorable,” she remarked in that drawl that never failed to surprise those who judged her solely by her Asian appearance.  It was a trait that the two of them shared.  If people judged Khan solely by his pale skin and light eyes, they would assume that he was Anglo, not Desi.

 

“It’s all his fault,” Khan defended himself, and he got to his feet to move over and give her a hug.  “How are you feeling?”

 

“Better,” she answered as she returned the embrace.  She pressed her lips together, hesitating, and Khan could guess the question she left unasked.

 

“They’ve given you supplementary hormones.  The preliminary scans don’t show anything amiss, but the next several days will tell us more.  That’s all I know from the chart log.  The doctor, I’m sure, will be able to give you exact details.”

 

She nodded, relaxing a bit.  “So far, so good,” she put in encouragingly.

 

“And you’ll let us know if anything changes.”

 

“Of course.”  She smiled then, brushing away the lingering worry with a turn of her mind to other thoughts.  “So.  Where are we?”

 

“Earth, in the 23rd Century,” he answered with a soft smile.  “The planet is united under one government.  Faster-than-light travel is possible.  We’ve made contact with a number of alien species, both sentient and non-sentient.  It’s an amazing time to be alive.”

 

Su was smiling as well.  “It sounds like a dream.”

 

“It’s certainly better than what we left behind.”

 

“How long have you been awake?” she asked then.

 

“I was revived a couple of years ago,” he found himself answering honestly.  “The circumstances were not ideal, but I was awake for a little more than a year before I was returned to cryosleep.  I was revived again yesterday.”

 

Her eyes narrowed, growing more distrustful of their safety with every word.  “If you were awake, why did they put you back?”

 

He gave her a look that was one part sad and one part haunted.  “It’s hardly flattering,” he murmured.  “You’ll hear the full extent of it soon enough, but it’s not worth worrying about now.  The circumstances are much different, I assure you.  And our primary objective will be waking and situating the others.”

 

“How many of us made it?”

 

“Seventy-three.  Twelve of the cryotubes failed from damage before the _Botany Bay_ was found.”  Khan never did figure out what happened to their bodies, but he suspected that Marcus used them for research purposes.  But he wasn’t going to think about that now.

 

“I see,” she murmured thoughtfully.  “And I suppose we’re being held in a secure location.”  She’d been his chief of security.  Their accommodations hadn’t gone unnoticed.

 

“Secure, yes,” he agreed, “but we’re not prisoners.  If anything, we’re being shepherded for our own protection.  History has not looked upon Augments with much kindness.  And neither has recent memory.  But it is what it is.”

 

Su pressed her lips together, regarding him for a moment, then moved past him and shook Joaquin’s foot to wake him up.  “You’d best start from the beginning,” she told Khan then, and when Joaquin moved his feet and sat up, she settled herself on the sofa.

 

Khan realized then that he couldn’t keep the truth from them.  Whatever plan he’d had to dazzle them with the state of the technology first and deliver the hard truth later dissolved before him.  These were his two strongest supporters.  They could take the truth.  So he pulled up a chair and sat across from them and told them the truth.  Every bit of it.


	8. Chapter 8

When Admiral Pike arrived the next morning, Khan was waiting for him in the consultation room.  He’d changed into white kurta shalwar with gold embroidery on the collar.  It made him look more regal than he felt.  “Good morning,” he greeted, and he stood in deference to the other man.

 

“Good morning,” Pike replied.  “I hope the evening went well for you last night.”

 

“Better than I’d hoped,” he confessed.  “I told them everything.”

 

Pike arched a brow.  “And how did _that_ go?” he asked as he settled into a spot on the sofa

 

“They are understandably concerned about the future,” he answered honestly, and he took his own seat again, “but for the moment they’ve turned their attention to educating themselves.”  Khan had left them both with padds and a short list of topics to research.  They would undoubtedly come up with more on their own, each according to their own interests.

 

“I’ll make sure to talk to both of them.  I want them to know that they’re in good hands.”

 

“I’ve assured them that much,” Khan told him.  Then he took a breath.  “I’ve decided to trust you,” he said then.  He said it more for his own benefit than Pike’s.  “And I’ve decided to accept your offer of working for Section 31.”

 

Pike regarded him for a moment, then nodded.  “Both good decisions, though I admit I’m biased.  What made up your mind?”

 

“Something Joaquin said.  Overthinking the situation only muddies the waters, especially when we’re capable of dealing with whatever may arise as time goes on.”  Pike had advertised himself as a reasonable, humane, charitable man.  Should that turn out to not be the case, they could always respond in such a way as to preserve their own interests.

 

And Pike seemed to understand that that was precisely what Khan was saying.  “Wise words,” he replied.  “I hope the only things you’ll have to deal with are those related to establishing yourselves here.  Speaking of which, we should set aside some time today to get you settled in to your new home.  I don’t want to take you away from your people for too long, but your things arrived out of storage last night and I thought you might want to get them sorted.”

 

“Of course,” Khan agreed.  He wondered where he would be living.  A billet in the officers’ district?  An apartment somewhere further afield?  But he didn’t ask.  He’d find out soon enough.

 

“Have you given any more thought to when you want to wake more of your crew?”

 

“Later this morning if at all possible,” he replied.  “Now that Joaquin and Su are awake, there’ll be one of us for every two of them.  That’s a good ratio to start with.”  Each Augment would have a hand in reviving the next set of people, so eventually it would cascade into a one-to-one or better ratio.  Every crewmember would have at least one person to turn to for answers to their general questions, and more specific information could be relayed in a group setting.

 

Pike nodded.  “I’ll let the med team know.  Any word on Su’s health?”

 

“Everything’s stable so far,” Khan reported.  “They put her through a deep scan this morning and it looks like the baby made it, though the next several days will tell the truth of that.”

 

He nodded.  “Good.  I’m glad.  She seemed very concerned.”

 

“She’s holding up well.”  He hadn’t been the only one to benefit from Joaquin’s presence.  He and Su were close as well.  Close enough to make Khan wonder whether he was the father of Su’s baby.  Lovers they might be, but they were hardly exclusive.

 

“Good,” Pike said again.  “So, looks like we’ve got a full day ahead of us.  I’d like to start off by talking with the two of them, then we can get the med team prepped to wake the others.  Have you had breakfast yet?”

 

He chuckled.  “Not yet.”

 

“Well, let’s start there then.  Breakfast and introductions.”  He got to his feet and gestured for Khan to follow.  Within minutes, they had a cart full of breakfast for four and a table in the day room to put it on.  Su came right out to join them, long overdue for a meal.  Joaquin had to be physically separated from the padd, more engrossed in the founding of the Federation than the idea of food.

 

“So how does a history teacher become the head of a clandestine intelligence organization?” Su asked a long while later.  She was curious about Pike as a person, and she didn’t mind asking questions to that effect.

 

“That’s a long and convoluted story,” the admiral answered with a chuckle.  “My parents died when I was twelve and I went to live with my biological father, who was married to the ‘Fleet.  Needless to say, by the time I was finished with school, I was all Starfleeted out.  I had an interest in history, so I steered my university education in that direction, got my bachelor’s, started teaching, worked on my master’s on term breaks.  But I wasn’t really happy with it.  I was content, but there’s not much room for advancement in education.  So my father’s friend Alex Marcus sits me down and talks me into taking the Academy entrance exam.  Mostly I figured if I did it it’d shut him up, so I go and I sit for this exam and I promptly proceed to exceed everyone’s expectations — including my own.  And all the recruiters are after me.  They want to know what it is that I need them to do for me to be interested in joining up, and I tell them I don’t want a shipboard posting.  I want to be a desk jockey.  I want to work in the archives.  I don’t want to go to space.  They say fine, we can do that.  So I enlist.  And my anti-space kick lasts until my third year of the Academy.  Everyone’s required to do a shipboard rotation and my number came up and off I go, and damn if I don’t fall in love with the stars.  End of my rotation, I come back to San Fran, I change my focus, and I go full-throttle for command track.  It was even worth the I-told-you-so’s.  After that, it was just a jaunt up the ranks.  Got my own ship, explored strange new worlds, met new life and new civilizations, nearly got myself killed more times than I can remember.  I made Admiral after the Battle of Vulcan.  Then I died for real and here I am.”

 

“Clearly alive and well,” Joaquin remarked.  “I take it your experience isn’t typical of Starfleet officers.”

 

“Not at all,” he agreed, though he was thinking of Jim as he said it.  “Most of them stay dead when they die, and they sure as hell don’t have their mentors doctor the records and hide them away.  From what I’ve been able to reconstruct, Admiral Marcus had the medical team fill out the paperwork as if I was dead on arrival, then had me stabilized and moved to a private hospital in San Diego.  After everything was said and done and Starfleet realized that there wasn’t a body to match the death certificate, they tracked me down, and they reasonably assumed that I had something to do with Alex’s grand plan to go to war with the Klingons.  I mean, he had moved heaven and earth to save my life and then hide it from everybody else.  I had to have something to do with it, right?  So they move me to a penal facility in Auckland.  I wake up in the brig.  And they keep me, and they question me, and they pore over every facet of my life until I don’t have a secret left, and they finally come to the conclusion that Alex saved me because I was the son he never had and regardless of the manipulation he put my first officer through, he didn’t want me to die on his watch.  And by that time — months later, I mean, this took forever — they realized the severity of their mistake and the hell they’ve put an otherwise outstanding officer through and the only apology they can give me is a promotion.  They can’t give me my life back.  They’d have to admit how seriously they’d screwed up, and that’s not going to happen.  That’s not the way the ‘Fleet works, not at this level of play.  What else could I do but take my promotion and my official identity and my pain-and-suffering payoff and make the best of it?”  He shrugged.  “At least this way, I can have a say in what happens.  With any luck, we can keep the peace going a little while longer and make the war as short and bloodless as possible.”

 

“And how do you plan to do that?” Su asked.

 

“That’s what Khan is for,” he answered.


	9. Chapter 9

It was late afternoon before Khan got a moment to himself.  After breakfast, he and the others had turned their attention to reviving the Augments still laying in cryosleep.  It had been a slow and repetitive process, but well worth it.  Now the six were awake.  Liam MacPherson, astronautics expert.  Kati Ahart, chief of intelligence.  Annette Nwokolo, physician and geneticist.  Antonio Rodriguez, ethics officer.  Kamui Murakami, assassin.  The unfortunately named Aleksandr Markos, artist and architect.

 

Another set of eight had been sent up from storage.  Khan had seen the cryotube-laden gurneys in the corridor when he’d gone to scare himself up a cup of chai.  The sight of them left butterflies in his stomach.  Now that the revival process was well underway, he felt rather like an expectant father.

 

Not that he’d felt that way when any of his three children had been born.  He’d been far removed from the process, and the mothers had all approved of his absent fatherhood.  They’d been women of means, exceptional in their own right, who’d wanted exceptional children but not the complications of a relationship.  Two girls and a boy, he recalled.  He wondered whether any of them had survived long enough to have children of their own.

 

The sound of Admiral Pike’s lopsided gait announced his entry into the dayroom.  “There you are.  Everyone tucked in?”

 

Khan looked up from his cup of tea and nodded.  “Resting comfortably,” he reported.  “They’ll probably wake up in the late hours, but that can’t be helped.”

 

“I don’t know.  You slept for a good long time.  It could be that they make it through till morning.”

 

“One can hope.”  He felt unaccountably fatigued.  Emotional stress, most likely.  He preferred not to glorify it with more attention than necessary.

 

“If you’ve got some time,” Pike said then, “there’s some business we need to attend to.”

 

“Of course.”  He pulled some motivation together and got to his feet, taking his mug of chai with him as the admiral led him back to his hospital room.  Philip Boyce was waiting alongside a tray with a few instruments on it.

 

“You’ll recall that one of the terms of your service was monitoring,” the admiral said.  “Doctor Boyce will install a subcutaneous transponder.  It’ll track your location.  As long as you’re at an approved location or en route between two locations, you’ll be fine.  But if you’re outside of the agreed-upon parameters, it’ll trigger a security alert and you can expect to be met with armed officers.  It’s pretty standard, but in your case the transmission frequency will be encrypted so only the people who need that information will have access to it.”

 

“If you would take off your shirt, please,” the doctor said then.  Khan set his mug of tea aside and pulled the kurta over his head.  Boyce directed him to turn his back with a gentle touch to the shoulder.  A moment later Khan could feel the other man counting vertebrae and pinching up the skin between the shoulder-blades, right where it was most difficult to reach.  After another few seconds there was a sting as the needle angled in and a slight burn as the tiny device was injected.  Boyce gave him a gentle pat on the back to let him know that he was finished, then turned to destroy the needle.

 

Khan pulled his kurta back on and rolled his shoulders to soothe the twinge between them.  “Thank you, Doctor,” he said, a gesture of polite gratitude to show that he didn’t hold Boyce personally responsible for the device.  Pike was correct.  Monitoring was part of their agreement, and it was a part that he would honor.

 

The man smiled.  “Take care of yourself,” he advised.  “You’ve got a lot of people counting on you.”  With a nod to Pike, he took his instruments and departed.

 

“Which brings me to the next item on the to-do list,” the admiral said.  He reached into his pocket and pulled out a small stack of cards.  “ID, access card, credit chip,” he said, handing the items to Khan.

 

The first card read “Starfleet Intelligence” and was issued in his own name in the rank of commander.  The second was an integrated access card similar to the one Marcus had once given him for a flat in London.  It was a key that would open many locks.  The third held markings for accounts with the banking institutions of Orion, Bolias, Ferenginar, and Andor.  He slid the cards into his pocket.  “Section 31 is a generous sponsor,” he remarked.

 

“You haven’t seen your new digs yet.”  Pike smiled.  “Come on.  I’ll show you.  It’s not far from here.”

 

A five-minute chauffeured car ride later — the landmarks told Khan they were in San Francisco — they arrived in front of a high-rise residential complex that Khan deduced from its architectural style, location, and the number of uniformed officers in the lobby to be accommodations for high-ranking Starfleet officers and their families.  The lift took them to the top of the building and opened into a private foyer.  A chandelier dominated the high ceiling and the far wall sported massive windowpanes.  The floor was marble tile and a mahogany wardrobe stood beside a matching door, one on each side of the foyer.

 

"Welcome home," Pike said as he stepped off the lift.  "You're on the left.  The front room might be a bit jumbled.  I had Logistics stack your things in there.  I’ll be across the hall.”

 

Khan chuckled softly.  “A penthouse, a private car, a friendly next-door neighbor.  Very comfortable conditions for house arrest.”

 

“Yeah, well, I like to keep my talent happy,” the admiral replied with a smile.

 

Khan smiled in return and moved to the door, pressing his access card against the lock pad.  The door opened a moment later to reveal an apartment that was understated, functional, and filled with little details of comfort.  A cashmere blanket lay folded over the back of an overstuffed leather sofa.  A terrarium bowl of succulents served as a centerpiece for the walnut dining table.  A framed viewscreen displayed message inboxes and calendar events.  And in the midst of it all stood large grey cargo lockers stacked three high.

 

It was at least orderly chaos, he thought as he stepped inside.  His first move was to open the nearest locker and verify that they were indeed his things.  What hadn’t come with him on the _Botany Bay_ he’d acquired over his time spent in Admiral Marcus’s employ, and it didn’t amount to much beyond his expansive wardrobe.  Clothes were his guilty pleasure, and one of the few comforts he’d been able to indulge under Marcus’s rule.

 

He found his violin in its case, a box of incense, a statue of Avalokiteshvara wrapped between layers of silk sheets.  Whoever had collected his things had done it in an orderly fashion, which was surprising considering the vehemence with which his flat must’ve been searched following the attack on the Kelvin Memorial Archive.  Perhaps some forward-thinking young officer had been thinking about the redistribution potential.

 

He closed the locker and stepped past it into the hallway which led to a spacious lav and bedroom.  The king-sized was made up in silver and blue.  A communicator lay on the bedside table.  He didn’t resist the urge to bodily flop on the bed, and he immediately determined it to be suitably comfortable.

 

He could get used to this, he decided.  He was sure it was all reasonable compensation for risking his life on what he was sure would prove to be some challenging missions on the Federation’s behalf, but for the moment, he was willing to accept that.  He didn’t even remember drifting off, but something woke him a little while later.

 

A wet-nosed something.  With green eyes and black fur.  And a stubby excuse for a tail, Khan realized as he reached up to pet the small cat.

 

“I don’t know where you came from, but I’m sure you don’t belong here.”  He reached up and gently scruffed the feline to immobilize her, then scooped her into a proper carrying embrace and rolled to his feet.  He went out the door and across the foyer and hit the doorchime on Pike’s lock pad.

 

A few moments later, the admiral appeared.  He’d abandoned his flag uniform in favor of a line officer’s off-duty blacks.  “Dammit, Lucy.”  He reached out and took the cat from Khan with an annoyed sigh.  Lucy mewed in half-hearted protest.  “That explains why she didn’t materialize at dinner.  Sorry about that.”  He stepped aside and waved Khan inside.  “Come on in.  Can I interest you in a cup of coffee?”

 

“That would be lovely, thanks,” he said as he entered.

 

“How do you take it?”

 

“Cream and sugar.”

 

Pike nodded and set Lucy on the couch, then made his way to the kitchen.  Khan glanced around.  The living room was all Mission furniture and desert colors.  He spied a guitar case near the fireplace, but what really caught his eye were all the pictures on the mantelpiece.  Somehow he hadn’t thought the admiral would be a sentimental man.  Here was strong proof to the contrary, and there were some familiar faces to be seen.  Jim Kirk.  Carol Marcus.  An older man in admiralty whites who bore a strong resemblance to Pike.  _Biological father_ , Khan realized.  A young couple who must be Pike’s deceased parents.  Admiral Marcus was conspicuously absent.

 

When Pike returned, it was with two mugs of hot coffee clasped by their handles in one hand.  Khan carefully accepted his with a murmur of thanks, and he followed the admiral to a pair of wingback chairs and took a seat.

 

“So,” Pike asked after he took a sip of coffee, “how do you like your new place?”

 

“It’s certainly comfortable,” he answered.  “And quiet.  I hadn’t expected a flat in the middle of the city to be so quiet.”

 

“We’re above most of the noise,” he responded, “and the Old City has a lot of special restrictions to maintain the historic atmosphere.”

 

“How close are we to Starfleet Headquarters?” he asked.

 

“Close.  We’re just east of the crash site.”

 

Khan cringed at the matter-of-fact tone.  “How goes the recovery effort?” he ventured.

 

“On schedule,” he answered.  “New buildings come up every week, but it’ll always be The Crash Site, I think.”  The _Vengeance_ had carved a new neighborhood into the north side of the city.  The Crash Site was just another district now, like The Mission and The Presidio.

 

Khan took a thoughtful sip of his coffee.  “I’m surprised you’re housed somewhere so conspicuous,” he said after a moment.  “Aren’t you concerned that someone will recognize you?”

 

“I’m the worst-kept secret in Starfleet,” he replied with a chuckle.  “The people who interact with me know who I am.  They just call me by a different name, at least in official communications.  But the uniform lends a degree of anonymity.  Even in San Francisco, there aren’t a lot of people who can keep track of everyone in the Admiralty.”

 

“It’s no small wonder that Captain Kirk hasn’t been appraised of your condition.”

 

“Admiral Komack made sure that the people who had a reason to know the truth also had a reason to keep their mouths shut.”  He smiled and shook his head.  “Personally, I’m amazed that he hasn’t been told yet.  It never ceases to astound me the sort of transparent lies that manage to hold the ‘Fleet together.”

 

“The fine art and science of official versions,” Khan remarked ruefully.  “Why haven’t you told him yourself?”  He was curious.  The man had a strong connection to Kirk and it was certainly within his power to do so.

 

“I’m only now at a point where I can begin to consider it,” he confessed.  “It wasn’t long ago that I was in a brig in New Zealand.  But Jim’s on assignment now, and a long-term one at that.  The first five-year mission in Starfleet’s history.  Getting in contact with him could be problematic.”

 

“An inconvenience he would greatly appreciate,” Khan pointed out.  “He thinks a great deal of you.”  At least the ferociousness of his punches seemed to indicate that.

 

“Oh, no matter what the circumstances, he’s not going to take it well,” Pike said then.  “He’ll see it as a betrayal of trust that I didn’t contact him as soon as I was able.  He’ll rationally understand the reasons, but emotionally he’ll have to process the shift in his foundation of reality before he gets around to being glad I’m alive.  I was thinking of twisting Komack’s arm and having him offer a formal apology.  It’d make the transition easier.”

 

“And direct that betrayal of trust somewhere more appropriate.”  Komack would blame Marcus for the deception, but he’d have to acknowledge Starfleet’s part in perpetuating it.

 

He nodded.  “But it still won’t be a walk in the park for either of us.  And Spock, God, he was mind-melded with me when I flatlined.  I owe him an explanation as well.”

 

“One would hope that the Vulcan would be accepting of the logical progression of events,” he remarked, though he remembered all too well how _emotional_ the commander could be when pressed.

 

“The only thing I’m certain of is that there are no easy answers.  And as much as I would like to make a reunion a top priority, the fact of the matter is that Jim and I both have more immediate priorities to deal with.  The secure ward will only hold half of your people at the max.  Before too much longer, we’re going to have to start shifting them to proper housing, at least until they decide where they want to end up.”

 

Khan considered that.  “They’ll want to stay together at first, if possible,” he mused.  “They’re accustomed to living and working in fairly close proximity.”  Indeed, most of them had permanent quarters at his compound in Chandigarh, back in the old days.

 

Pike nodded at that.  “I’m looking into housing options in the south end of The Crash Site.  It’s close to Starfleet and the major governmental buildings, but far enough away to not be Uniformland.  My hope is to give your people a centralized place to start from, then as they adjust, they can relocate as suits their personal preferences and career choices.  But in the beginning, I anticipate they’ll be using a lot of academic and governmental resources.  You’ll be a great help to them in that regard.  You already know your way around the bureaucratic structure.”

 

“So I take it my first assignment will be facilitating their assimilation into the 23rd Century.”

 

“That will be your major responsibility to begin with, but you’ll also spend some time in operational preparation.  How’s your Klingon?”

 

Khan arched a brow.  “I understand more than I can convey, but I’m hardly conversational.”

 

“I need you to become an expert,” Pike told him.  “Language, culture, battle tactics.  Everything we know about them, I need you to learn.  You come from a warrior culture.  You’re a one-man army in your own right.  If anyone can come up with a reasonable approximation of what the Klingons are thinking, it’s you.”

 

He considered that.  It was true that he came from a culture which prided itself on martial prowess.  He had practiced _gatka_ since he was a child, and his training in modern military combat had only supplemented his lifelong familiarity with warfare as an art form.  The Klingons were also a warrior culture, though he had to wonder what the prevailing reason was for being so.  Were they like the Sikhs?  Did they have a spiritual reason for their emphasis on warfare?  Or was Klingon culture built on personal honor and glory?

 

“I’ll see what I can do,” he said at last.


	10. Chapter 10

Carol Marcus lay on a biobed in Medbay, waiting for Doctor McCoy to come back.  He’d taken a blood sample and mumbled something about a routine lab test, which she had taken to mean a post-incident intoxicant screening.  It would come back perfectly clean, she knew, and therefore she had no concerns about getting back to work as soon as she was finished here.  She was only here as a precaution anyway.  She’d been doing routine maintenance in the torpedo tubes and had gotten dizzy with all the climbing and squatting and reaching.  She hadn’t actually fainted, but it had been close enough that she’d had to call for help to get out, and so Mr. Scott had advised her to report for a physical “for the sake of being thorough.”

 

It was a sound decision.  She’d make the same call in his place, no doubt about it.  And while it irked her that she hadn’t been able to just take a quick break and get back to work when the spell passed, that was the way things were and she could abide by the inconvenience.

 

“Well, Lieutenant, I think I found your problem,” McCoy said as he approached.  Carol sat up, arching a brow.  She was about to ask what he meant when he said in a much quieter tone, “You’re pregnant.”

 

“No, I’m not,” she answered automatically.  She’d been on contraceptives for years.  Even if Jim had been lying about being on them as well, it shouldn’t matter.

 

“According to the scanners, you are,” McCoy told her.  His tone was serious, but his eyes were concerned.

 

She shook her head, disbelieving.  “Then try a different scanner.”  There had to be some mistake.  She couldn’t be pregnant.  Could she?

 

He took a padd from under his arm and presented her with a lab readout for human chorionic gonadotropin.  “That’s why I took a blood sample.  Lab confirms it.  You’re pregnant.”

 

She looked at the numbers and saw that they were right in the middle of the range for five weeks’ gestation.  She blew out a hard breath.  “Bloody hell.”  This couldn’t be happening.  Only, apparently, it was.

 

“I checked your prescription regimen,” he said.  “Looks like you beat the odds.  The next step is deciding what you want to do about it.  Now, don’t worry about anything straightaway.  I’ll send you a consultation report.  It’ll give you the details on what your options are and when decisions have to be made by.  But no matter which route you take, the regulations require that I inform the captain.”

 

“Don’t,” she said before she could stop herself, then she quickly amended, “I mean, I know you have to tell him, but if you tell him there’ll be questions, and I can’t deal with questions right now.”

 

“I’ve got twenty-four hours to report,” McCoy told her kindly.  “So I’m thinking I’ll tell him twenty-three hours from now.”  He gave her a look then.  “I’m required to report a pregnancy,” he told her.  “I’m _not_ required to report anything you tell me about the father or the circumstances.  That falls under privilege.  But if the father is less than an ensign or more than a commander, I’d recommend that you not name names.”

 

Regulations and their attendant politics.  Carol might be reeling from shock, but she hadn’t forgotten that her career was at stake.  “I don’t recall who the father is, sir,” she lied.  They were words she was going to have to get used to saying.

 

“I’ll make a note in your chart,” he replied.  Carol wasn’t sure if he believed her or if he simply didn’t want to open that can of worms.  Or maybe he was just doing the bare minimum required for his professional duties and would look for an off-the-record conversation later on.  In any case, it was a weight off of Carol’s shoulders to not have to broach the subject of the other party involved in this pregnancy.

 

“Take the rest of the day off, Lieutenant,” he told her then.  “I’ll inform Mr. Scott that you’re cleared to return to duty tomorrow at 0800.  I’ll schedule a follow-up for next week.  Until then, try not to fly off the handle.  You’ve got time, you’ve got options.  Take a bit to adjust, and we’ll discuss the particulars of the next step when you’re ready.”

 

“And you won’t tell the captain until tomorrow.”

 

“Tomorrow at 1300,” he confirmed.

 

“Thank you,” she said gratefully.  “I appreciate it, I really do.”

 

“It’s nothing,” he demurred.  “Now get out of here.  Take care of yourself.  And if you need anything, give me a call.  I don’t want you stressing yourself sick about this.  We invented anxiolytics for a reason.”

 

She nodded and slid off the table, smoothing her skirt as she stood.  “I’ll do my best.”  She offered a weak smile then.  “Thank you, Leonard.”

 

“You’re welcome, Carol.  Take it easy.  I mean it.  You need to talk, you know where to find me.”

 

Taking it easy would be easier said than done, she knew, but as she walked away she already had a clear idea in mind of what she was going to do next.  She went to her quarters, fixed herself a cup of tea, added half a shot of whisky to further soothe her frayed nerves, and made herself finish the entire cup before she did anything else.

 

Pregnant.  She was pregnant.  It wasn’t the end of the world.  There were options.  But there was also beating the odds, and she had to give at least a moment’s thought to the fact that not one but _two_ highly effective forms of contraception had failed in order for this pregnancy to occur.  Jim wouldn’t have lied to her about being on shots.  As much as he got around, he could hardly afford to play fast and loose with biology.

 

She was going to have to tell him.  She couldn’t _not_ tell him.  He deserved far better than to hear it from Doctor McCoy.  And at least that way she’d have a better idea of how much she could count on him in the next few weeks.  It’s not as if this was a discussion either of them had planned on having.  And Jim, for all he tried to pretend that he didn’t, had serious issues surrounding fathers and fatherhood.

 

Not for the first time did Carol wish that her honorary uncle was still alive.  Chris had always been good for problem-solving conversations.  She couldn’t call Christine; that would add insult to injury on the Jim Kirk front.  There was no one besides Jim on the ship that she could confide in.  She supposed she could call her mother, but she wasn’t in the mood for a June Wallace special right now.  Emotional pleas to come home would fall on deaf ears.

 

She wasn’t leaving this ship.  She wanted this ship and this mission.  She wasn’t going to let accidental reproduction change her plans.  She just needed a better idea as to how she was going to handle the issue of reproduction itself.

 

She glanced up at the chrono.  It was just before 1500.  She debated leaving Jim a message, then decided against it.  It was better to not leave a cryptic or urgent message.  That would only put him on edge, and she wanted him to be as calm and relaxed as possible.  She’d just wait until after shift change and invite him over after dinner.

 

All she had to do was keep calm until then.

 

Easy peasy.


	11. Chapter 11

Jim pressed the doorchime and waited for Carol to answer.Even if she hadn’t invited him over, he would’ve at least commed.He’d heard through the backchannels that she’d nearly passed out today, which was totally unlike her.Scotty had already sent her to Medbay or he would’ve insisted she go himself.

 

He couldn’t help worrying about her.Worry was the watchword of their relationship.They worried about who saw them.They worried about how much time they spent together.They worried about whether they were being appropriately professional in their interactions.It was a lot of worry, but that was what they’d signed on for.

 

“Jim,” Carol greeted when the door slid open.“Please, come in.”She gestured him inside, a soft smile on her face, but it didn’t reach her eyes and that made Jim cautious.

 

Something was wrong.

 

He stepped inside and the door closed behind him.He made sure he heard it lock before he reached for her and pulled her into his arms.She didn’t hesitate, and in fact she snuggled close to him for a long moment, but she didn’t offer a kiss.That told him that she was upset about something but not necessarily upset _at him._

 

“What is it?” he asked after a moment.

 

She chuckled a sad sound.“Am I that obvious?” she asked as she pulled away.She tugged on his hand and led him to the couch to sit down.

 

“Well, you don’t look happy and there are three mugs of tea on that table,” he told her matter-of-factly.“That, and you had to be pulled out of a torpedo tube today.Don’t think I didn’t hear about that.”

 

She reached for his hand and held onto it.“Before I tell you, I want your word that you’ll hear me out.I haven’t made any decisions yet, but it is a time-sensitive issue, and it’s very private.Whatever happens, the crew doesn’t need to know.”

 

He squeezed her hand.“Of course,” he agreed, but in his head he was already narrowing down the possibilities.Something time-sensitive that required a decision.Something that she was asking his open-mindedness on.What had happened?Was she sick?

 

“Jim, I’m pregnant.”

 

The way she said it, so calm and professional, caught him off-guard almost as much as the words themselves.That was her Doctor Marcus voice, her ‘just the facts, ma’am’ voice.She was distancing herself from the information she was delivering, and he could totally understand why because he sure as hell wished he could do that right about now.

 

He wanted to ask her to run that by him again, but there was no use.They both knew what she’d said.And they both knew how exceptional the very notion was, given that her contraception and his contraception had to have failed at the same time in order for it to happen.Talk about some astronomical odds.Well, not really.But it was a hell of a coincidence.And now he was wondering why he hadn’t considered the possibility before.

 

“Jim?”

 

He blinked and shook his head.“Sorry.Just, the odds of that happening…”He was too surprised to overreact.He supposed that was a good thing in this case.

 

She laughed softly then, and he was glad for it.They sure as hell needed some humor in this situation.“I told Bones to try a different scanner, I was so gobsmacked.”

 

Bones.God, of course.He’d have to report it as a matter of operational readiness.But he’d have twenty-four hours to do that in, and being the sympathetic soul he was, he’d probably wait till the last minute.

 

Which made Jim wonder whether his friend knew.“You didn’t tell him who the father was, did you?”

 

“Of course not,” she retorted.“I value my career and service record.I told him I couldn’t recall.It makes me sound like the ship’s bike, but it’s better than asking for a disciplinary hearing.”

 

“He’s not an idiot, Carol.”

 

“He’s also not going to get either of us into more trouble than he absolutely has to.He knows the regulations as well as we do.He’s just building a case for what he knows officially.What he knows _unofficially_ is a whole other matter.”

 

Jim sighed then.So now their relationship involved official reports.Dammit.“What are you going to do?” he asked then.Because this was definitely a time-sensitive situation, and one that he needed to be aware of as a captain.There were special procedures where pregnancies and starships were concerned.He also needed to be aware as a partner, but he had to admit to a bit of hiding behind professionality as well.

 

“I haven’t decided yet,” she answered, then she squeezed his hand, reminding him of their connection.“I want this ship, Jim.I want this mission.But as for the rest of it, I need some time to think.”

 

He nodded then.That was reasonable.Beyond reasonable, really.He needed some time to think as well.“After I get the official report, I’ll have thirty days to come up with an operational strategy,” he told her.“I can probably stretch that to six or seven weeks if you need.But after that, I really have to know what you’re going to do so I can plan the ship’s response accordingly.”One way or the other, she’d need time off and modified duties.If she decided to have the baby — and that was way outside of his zone of comprehension right now — they’d have to make arrangements for getting to a space station or planetside posting before she gave birth.

 

“I shouldn’t need more than 30 days,” she assured him.“In cases like this, the sooner, the better.I just need some time to go over my options.”

 

He nodded, then drew her into a hug.“No matter what you choose, I’m here for you.I mean it.”He couldn’t make the decision for her, but he could hold her hand through it all.

 

“Even if it means talking through a load of stressful hypothetical situations?” she asked.

 

“Yes,” he replied, and it felt all too much like the calm before the storm.He knew what at least two of those conversations would be about, and he didn’t know which one he dreaded more.

 

She leaned up and brushed a kiss across his jaw then.“Thank you, Jim,” she murmured.

 

“Don’t mention it,” he replied softly, and he reached up to gently pet her hair.The worst part about any of this, he reflected, was that he couldn’t go for a drink with his best friend to clear his head.Plausible deniability and official versions had to come into play somewhere.But she was in the same boat, he realized, only, strictly speaking, she shouldn’t be drinking much at all.They only had each other in this, at least for the time being.

 


	12. Chapter 12

Khan watched from the front of the room as his people filed in.  They were all awake now, all seventy-two of them.  Many of them had come to the hospital auditorium from a residential complex on the southern end of The Crash Site.  Some had come from the secure ward, several floors above where they now stood.  They wore the garb of their peoples, brightly arrayed against the neutral backdrop of the hospital walls.

 

This was the first time that the entire company had stood together since they’d prepared to board the _Botany Bay_ over two hundred years ago.

 

Admiral Pike stood beside him, he in admiralty whites and Khan in formal grays.  They were the only two people in the room wearing Starfleet uniforms, and Pike was the only non-Augment in attendance.  They were both aware of the mixed feelings from the others on that point.  Not everyone was reassured by the admiral’s personable attitude and accommodating nature.  Some were definitely more trusting of him than others.  But that had been the case since people had been woken up.  It was going to take some time for them to settle into their own conclusions about the man.

 

“There’s still time to change your mind,” Pike murmured quietly to him.

 

“I’m not going to change my mind,” Khan replied in the same tone.  “They need to know where I stand.  The best approach is the direct approach.”

 

The admiral nodded.  “Very well,” he replied as the last of the Augments took their seats.  “I’ll give you the floor.”  He made his way to the seat reserved for him — next to Kamui Murakami, whose interest in the admiral had not gone unnoticed by anyone — and Khan walked up the steps and crossed the stage to the podium.

 

“Good morning,” he greeted his family, addressing them in formal tones in light of the nature of their gathering.  “It’s my great honor and pleasure to address you today, and to mark the end of two hundred sixty-four years in cryogenic suspension.  When last we were gathered together, we were condemned men and women, convicted of crimes we did not commit and had no part in.  When given the choice between certain death and an uncertain future, we chose the future.  We have always chosen the future.

 

“The year is 2260.  Humanity has left behind inequality, poverty, and corporate supremacy for inclusivity, abundance, and the radical notion that people have a value not measurable in currency.  Indeed, in this post-scarcity economy, the idea of money is as foreign to most as the idea of world peace once was to you and me.  Humanity has come a long way since the time of the Eugenics Wars.  It’s an amazing time to be alive.

 

“But this time is not without its challenges,” he continued.  “History has not been kind to us, and prejudice against Augments is alive and well.  As a result, we must turn to the governments of Tellar Prime, Andoria, New Vulcan, and others to secure refugee status and pursue legal recognition of citizenship.  We are in the unenviable position of predating the foundation of United Earth and the United Federation of Planets, however that position is not without precedent.  The process will be long, but our legal consultants are confident of a successful outcome.

 

“In the meantime, there is much for us to do.  We are each of us historical and cultural treasures.  All that we have learned and experienced, all that we are capable of, have value and should be appropriately disseminated.  To that end, upon official announcement of our presence to the public, a truth and reconciliation commission will be convened to address allegations of war crimes and sentient rights violations occurring during the Eugenics Wars.  All of you will be invited to make statements.  I myself will be providing both written and oral testimony.  Such action is not only historically valuable, it is also a necessary step in good-faith negotiation with planetary and interplanetary government.  If we are to make the Federation our new home, then we must do so in the spirit of transparency and honesty.

 

“Some of you may be wondering why I am advocating a wholehearted adherence to established protocol.  The answer is simple.  We are not above the law.  If the Eugenics Wars have taught us nothing else, it is that much.  If we want the benefit of Federation citizenship, then we must agree to abide by Federation law.  It is a slow, frustrating, and inefficient process, but it is the process to which we must submit ourselves.

 

“Some of you may also be wondering why I am willingly aligning myself with Starfleet’s covert intelligence service.  The answer is also simple.  I am a terrorist and a murderer.  As a felon, I am ineligible for many of the benefits that you all may enjoy.  Section 31 is my best hope for a successful future.  Admiral Pike has proven a fair and just warden, unlike his predecessor Admiral Marcus about whom some of you have heard, and I have full confidence in his ability to put my skills to the best possible use.  Also take note that none of you are required to share my fate.  Indeed, I encourage all of you to seek your own niches in which to excel.  It is through that variety that our charge to raise the whole of humanity to greater heights can be fulfilled.

 

“And now,” he concluded, “because I know there will be many of them, I’ll open the floor to questions.”

 

There was a murmur throughout the auditorium, then someone spoke up.  “How long will Section 31 continue to see to our needs?”

 

“Until other provisions are made,” Khan answered confidently.  “It’s reparation for the way things should have been handled all along but weren’t.”

 

“How do we know our applications for refugee status will be accepted?” another Augment asked.

 

“We don’t,” Khan replied.  “That’s why we’re submitting ourselves to the process.  If it’s unsuccessful, there are other options available to us, but right now we’re focusing on the legal and overt approach.  This is one occasion where our status as genetically engineered individuals is both a burden and a boon.  While officially any Federation member government will frown upon us for our heritage, unofficially it provides certain benefits to anyone who would open their doors to us.”

 

“What about the dead?” Kamui asked.  “The twelve who didn’t make it.”

 

“We’ve located their bodies and there will be a memorial soon.  The details will be forthcoming as soon as they’re settled.”

 

It was Su who asked the next question.  “We’re all aware of the Federation’s ban on genetic engineering.  Does that extend to the biological offspring of Augments?  That is, are we going to be prevented from having children?”

 

It was the first of the really penetrating questions.  Khan knew there would be more of them.  He glanced to Admiral Pike.  To his surprise, the admiral got to his feet.  “I’ll speak to that,” the man said in a voice that carried throughout the room.  “A private family life is a protected right of sentient beings.  It’s one of the rights guaranteed to Federation citizens.  But it is possible that elements within the Federation may seek to interfere with that right for prejudicial reasons.  If that happens, then all we can do is fight it.  But I have no intention of enforcing any order that seeks to infringe on the basic rights of sentient beings.”

 

Aleksandr spoke up next.  “Is full integration the endgame here,” he asked in his Russian-influenced Greek accent, “or will we be expected to remain at least partially isolated from the rest of society?”

 

“Full integration is our goal,” Khan was quick to answer.  “Your current housing situation is temporary.  As individual requests for asylum are processed, I expect each of you to decide for yourself where you want to settle.  That doesn’t necessarily have to be on Earth or with the people you’re currently living with.  The world is an impossibly vast place now, and not everyone feels the same way about Augments that most humans do.  It’s entirely possible to find peaceful and supportive environments in which to settle down.  The major challenge is going to be the paperwork.”

 

That sent another murmur through the assembly.  Khan could pick out the emotions.  Surprise.  Hope.  Skepticism.  Defensive fear.  He couldn’t blame them for any of it.  They’d all heard about what had happened when the _Botany Bay_ had first been found.  Khan couldn’t blame them for not believing that a peaceful and progressive life was possible when their first experience with the 23rd Century had been one of corruption, coercion, and endangerment.

 

He spent the next half hour addressing various concerns, some more mundane than others.  When he dismissed his people, they filed out in pairs and small groups.  Most would be returning to the secure ward.  During the daytime, the floor was packed with Augments visiting their fellows.  Most of them had formed study groups based on personal and professional relationships.  They spent the days trading information and the evenings collecting more data to share.  It was both efficient and encouraging.  On the whole, people were adapting well to their new circumstances.

 

Admiral Pike moved to join him as he came down the stage steps.  “It’s a good first step,” he remarked.

 

Khan smiled softly.  “How long until they start asking to join up, I wonder?”

 

Pike chuckled at that.  “Kam’s already made her request.  I suspect she won’t be the last.”

 

“The real question is, are you going to take them up on their offers to join Section 31?”

 

“Perhaps,” the admiral answered.  “It’s early days.  They might change their minds.”

 

“We’ll see,” he said, though he knew that Kam wouldn’t.  She’d been trained as an assassin.  The shadowy world of covert operations was all she knew.  “I’m headed upstairs to make the rounds,” he said.  “Are you coming as well?”

 

“No, I’ve got an appointment at Headquarters.  But I’ll be back for lunch.”  It was a large catered affair in the private dining room, another gathering point for the newly awoken Augments.  After that would be another meeting, this time hosted by the legal and diplomatic teams.  It would provide a starting point for the asylum process and get people assigned to case management teams.

 

“I’ll see you then,” Khan replied with a smile.  He watched as the man made his way out, then headed to the nearest turbolift to head back up to the secure ward.


	13. Chapter 13

Jim ordered a spearmint-chamomile tea from the replicator in his quarters.  It wasn’t his typical choice of beverage, but then it wasn’t a typical day.  He’d woken from troubled sleep to a full-fledged anxiety attack, rolled out of bed under sheer force of will, and stumbled to the lav before he’d thrown up everything he’d ever thought about eating the night before.  A hot shower had soothed him somewhat, but he’d been on-edge all throughout his shift.  He hadn’t even hidden it particularly well, which worried him.  He was usually able to compartmentalize better.

 

He sat down on his bed, took a sip of his tea, and toed off his boots.  His gold uniform tunic had already been abandoned in favor of the black shirt beneath, and he was glad that the symbolic weight of it was off of his shoulders for a little while.  He set the mug aside and stretched out on the bed, taking a deep breath and consciously relaxing his muscles.  It didn’t work as well as he’d hoped it would.  Sometimes that’s how it was.

 

He knew he should probably comm Carol.  They should talk about things.  It wouldn’t help his nerves, but avoiding the situation wasn’t going to make things any better either.  But the very thought of making that call made his stomach clench and churn.  And he didn’t really know why that was.  There were too many conflicting ideas floating around in his head to pick out the individual culprit.  On one hand, it wasn’t his decision to make.  On the other hand, whatever decision she made affected both of them.  And the baby.

 

He knew that it was early days and that realistically they were talking about the _potential_ for life rather than anything truly viable, but he still thought of it as a baby.  A little part of him.  Something precious that needed protecting.  And of course that idea was _completely_ at odds with Jim’s dogged and rational insistence that he was no fit candidate for fatherhood.  Never had been.  He liked not having his independence infringed on.  And yet there was a little part of him that kept reminding him that there was a tiny Kirk to be considered and how that changed everything.

 

He felt like a fucking hypocrite.

 

Jim had never had a moral aversion to a pregnant individual’s right to choose how to conduct said pregnancy.  He was perfectly aware that he, as a non-uterus-bearing person, didn’t have a place to stick his nose into the business of those who did.  But the mere thought of a baby made him think of his own family, battered and broken from tragedy after tragedy.  It made him think of the circumstances of his own birth and the inherent danger of shipboard life.  It made him think of everything that could possibly go wrong.  And it made him think that he could beat the odds in this as well.

 

It was a perfectly insane state of mind to be in.

 

He heaved a sigh, sat up, and took another swig of tea.  This was getting him nowhere.  He was just going to keep stewing things over in his head until he talked to Carol and got some definite information to work with.  He should man up, comm her, and get it over with.

 

After he finished his tea.

 

It was a blatant stalling tactic, so obvious that he couldn’t even lie to himself and pretend that it wasn’t, but he rationalized it by telling himself that he’d be in a slightly better mindset for this conversation if his nerves weren’t vibrating at a particularly dissonant frequency.

 

His communicator chirped once.  Twice.  He reached for it with his other hand and flipped it open.  “Kirk here.”  God, he sounded like a wreck.

 

“Captain.”  Of course it would be Carol.  The universe had a sadistic sense of humor.  She sounded a lot better than he did, but then they both had a policy of wearing their professional masks any time there was the possibility that someone could overhear them.  “I need to talk with you.  It’s pressing but not urgent.  Is now a good time?”

 

“Yeah,” he answered before he could change his mind.  “Stop by my quarters.  I’m off-duty.”

 

“Thank you, sir.  I’ll be there in a few minutes.  Marcus out.”

 

He closed his communicator and set it aside.  Well.  Any hope of getting his head together before this conversation happened just got sucked out the airlock.  Maybe that was a good thing.  He didn’t know.  He felt like he should know.  He didn’t know which was worse.

 

Jim counted the seconds until the doorchime sounded.  “Enter,” he called, the computer automatically unlocking the door and opening it.  Carol stepped inside and let the door close behind her.  When the lock engaged, she moved to the bed and sat down beside him and reached up to stroke his hair.

 

“Rough day?”

 

“The day was fine,” he answered truthfully, and he leaned into the petting just a bit.  “I was the one who was rough.”

 

“Drink your tea,” she suggested with a soft smile.  “It helps, I promise.”

 

He had forgotten he’d been holding the mug.  He brought it to his lips and took another long sip before setting it aside with a sigh.  “So, are we going to talk about this?”

 

“No,” she replied, and she toed off her boots.  “We’re going to lay down for a little while, and then we’re going to begin to talk about it.”  Before he could respond to that, she was guiding him down to the bed and snuggling up next to him, her head on his shoulder, her hand over his heart.

 

It was an effective strategy, which both annoyed and reassured Jim.  Carol knew when he needed gentle handling.  She was very good at reading people that way.  At first it had been off-putting, but then he’d realized that she genuinely meant to help and not to patronize.  It hadn’t taken long for him to grow accustomed to letting his guard down around her, and they’d only been together … six weeks?  Seven?

 

It sounded so torrid when he put it that way.

 

Jim wrapped an arm around Carol’s shoulders and leaned his head against hers.  He didn’t want to think about anything but how good it felt to be next to her.  He was getting decidedly sentimental in his old age, he thought to himself.  But then again, maybe it was all the trauma he’d weathered recently.  That’d make anyone appreciate what they had.  Was he turning into a basket case?  He really hoped he wasn’t turning into a basket case.  It’d be insulting after all the things he’d been through in his life.

 

It was a long time before either of them spoke again.  Jim was still ill at ease, but Carol’s presence had helped more than he liked to admit.  But then, he’d always been a very tactile person and they were cuddling.  Whatever the case, it settled his nerves enough that he could actually consider the question when Carol asked, “Are you going to treat me differently because of this?”

 

“Pregnancy is by definition a special consideration on board a starship,” he replied, “and I can’t pretend I’m unbiased in this.”

 

“So you’d treat me differently than you would any other crew member who happened to be pregnant.”

 

“For good or ill, yes.  I mean, let’s be real here.  I could try to be objective and probably end up failing miserably.  But I can promise that Ill try to keep the special treatment to a minimum.”  He could commit to that much.

 

“Then I guess that’s where we should start,” she said.  “Considering I go through with this, and it’s not a decision I’ve even begun to make yet, I want to stay on this ship.”

 

“And you would,” he answered.  “I mean, we’d have to make arrangements to transfer you to a non-shipboard posting once you delivered, but—“

 

“No, Jim,” she said firmly.  “I want to stay on this ship.  Even after the baby’s born.”

 

He looked down at her like she was crazy.  “Carol.  That is _beyond_ insane.  A starship is no place for a baby, and I am the showcase reason why!”

 

“And I thought you acknowledged that there was going to be some special treatment involved.  This is a personnel issue.  Captains and chief medical officers have authority over specialized duty rosters for extenuating circumstances on a case-by-case basis.”

 

“It’s also an operational readiness issue,” he argued.  “We’re on a long-term mission in uncharted space.  Anything could happen.  We don’t have the resources to take care of a baby.”

 

“You could generate the resources.  It’s been done before.  It’s not like it’s unprecedented.  The only difference is the duration.”

 

“Do you even realize what you’re saying?  The baby would be almost three years old before he set foot off the ship!”

 

“It’s been done before.”

 

“On larger ships with larger crew complements on shorter missions in safer regions of space.  And even then, there are no guarantees.”  He pressed his lips together.  “I was born in space, Carol.  In the middle of a firefight and evacuation.  My father died making sure my mother and I lived.”

 

“And you’re afraid history might repeat itself.”

 

He opened his mouth to deny it, then realized that it was exactly what he was worried about.  He knew what it was like to live without a father.  He wouldn’t wish that on anyone, especially his own child.  “And that we might get into some sort of altercation and something happen to the baby,” he added after a moment.  All it would take would be an explosion knocking something over or a hull breach on the right deck.  It made Jim’s stomach turn just to think about it.

 

“Jim,” Carol murmured.  “We’d take all necessary precautions.  Shipboard life comes with its own risks, yes, but we wouldn’t be negligent or irresponsible.  We’d do everything we could.”  She paused.  “But I suppose I’m assuming you’d want to be involved.”

 

“Carol, I don’t even _know_ ,” he answered honestly.  “I mean, on one hand, I have carefully avoided paternity because my lifestyle wasn’t compatible with it, but on the other hand, this is a little bit beyond the pale.  I had Bones run a med check this afternoon — on a completely hypothetical level, of course — and he says everything’s at optimal levels.  This shouldn’t have happened.”

 

“Except that it did.  We’re that one-in-a-billion case where everything came together against all odds.  And that’s the _only_ thing that’s giving me pause about having an abortion straightaway.  I’m a scientist.  I put my faith in things that are quantifiable.  But when something happens like this that’s so rare and so unexpected, it makes me wonder if it shouldn’t be allowed to continue, if there’s not a reason for it happening.”

 

He nodded and snuggled her closer.  It was how he felt about it as well, and he was glad she was able to put it into words for him.  “So I guess what we really need to do is decide whether we’re going to do something completely insane or something completely reasonable.  Because it doesn’t seem like there’s a whole lot of in-between that we’re considering right now.”

 

She brushed a kiss across his jaw.  “Yes.  That’s precisely what it seems like.”  And it would likely be several conversations before they came to any firm conclusions.


	14. Chapter 14

The sun was setting in San Francisco.The light made the Southwestern decor of Chris’s flat look even more vibrant than it already was.Khan was sitting at the bar nursing a cup of coffee while the admiral was grilling chicken breasts on a griddle pan.It had surprised Khan to learn that people still cooked in the 23rd Century.He’d thought that humanity would have dispensed with that drudgery the moment replicators came along, but there was something about the process that Chris seemed to enjoy.

 

“Sixteen,” Khan mused.“That’s about right.”

 

“It’s almost a quarter of your crew,” the admiral pointed out.“And they’re serious about wanting to join Section 31.”

 

“They’d distinguish themselves there.”

 

“They would.But I don’t even know what I’d do with that many Augments.”

 

“The same thing you’re doing with me,” Khan suggested.“You’re going to need experts in Klingon language and culture, and you’re going to need people capable of completing a wide variety of mission objectives with a high level of difficulty and a narrow opportunity for success.You said it yourself.You want this war to be as short and bloodless as possible.The way to make that happen is to minimize the number of overt encounters between combatants.This war needs to be fought in the shadows.”

 

“And you think you and your people can make that happen.”

 

“It wouldn’t be the first time.”He’d done it before, for all the good it had done him.

 

Chris flipped the chicken breasts and asked, “How did you do it the last time?”

 

“Precision strikes, counterintelligence, sabotage, assassination.”He paused then, considering how honest he wanted to be with the man, and decided to keep going.“And the power to back up threats.Just because I was the most enlightened of the Augment princes doesn’t mean I didn’t have some nasty options at my disposal.”He used to be proud of that fact.Now he wasn’t so sure of himself.

 

“Well,” Chris remarked, “I don’t know how nasty I can get, but I’ve definitely got a surprise or two in store.”He stepped aside, grabbing a nearby padd and calling up a file, then passing it over to Khan.

 

The images on display were at once very familiar and very unexpected.“This is not the _Vengeance_ ,” Khan said after a moment.Even half-completed, he could tell the ship in the photographs was brand new.

 

“She’s called the _Retribution_ ,” Chris confirmed.“The latest in the Dreadnaught class.Preliminary construction had already begun on her when the _Vengeance_ was destroyed.It was one of the projects that Section 31 kept active even though Marcus wasn’t around to oversee it.Some of her components were built at Utopia Planitia, some at Riverside.Now she’s being assembled in drydock at Io Facility.She’ll be spaceworthy in a matter of months.”

 

“To what purpose?I thought you wanted to avoid overt war.”

 

“I do, but overt war might not avoid us.She’s a fast ship, she’s powerful, and with her stealth plating and her warp masking capabilities, she’s going to see trouble well before trouble sees her.That’s what’s going to make her a good base of operations should circumstances come to that.”

 

Khan continued to flip through the images on the padd.This ship had Federation markings, he noted.The stealth plating gave the hull a gunmetal gray hue, but the _Retribution_ ’s name, registry number, and service markings were nonetheless visible in the places where the hull had been completed.“I suppose Starfleet took some convincing before they allowed her on the official register,” he remarked after a long moment.

 

“Let’s just say I had to make some serious promises to the brass,” Chris answered ruefully.“Before, she was a clandestine project.Now, she’s more like an official prototype.”

 

“Hence the NX designation.”

 

Chris made a sound of assent.

 

“Who’s going to be commanding her?” Khan asked.“You?”

 

“I wish,” the admiral replied with a chuckle.“No, I’m the head of Section 31.That’s enough of a ship to captain without adding actual spacecraft to the mix.One of the projects I’ve been trying to tackle in my free time is coming up with a short list.I don’t want someone who’s more loyal to Marcus’s ideology than my orders, you know?”

 

“Then you’d better choose someone who has good reason to be well-disposed to you.”

 

“By which you mean an Augment,” he remarked wryly.

 

Khan smiled.“Naturally.I’m not in a position to do it, but there are others who are more than capable of learning the necessary skills.”

 

Chris stepped away to check on the food.“I’m not going to dismiss the suggestion out of hand,” he answered as he pulled the chicken off the griddle pan and put some asparagus on, “but I do need to make sure that each of you are put to work where your skills and insight are most needed.It may be more beneficial to have the Augments free from the limitations of a shipboard posting.We’ll have to see.”

 

“Fair enough,” Khan replied easily.At least the man was considering all options.That was encouraging.He set the padd aside and took another long sip of his coffee.

 

Within minutes, the meal was ready, and Chris brought to the table chicken breasts with margarita sauce, grilled asparagus, and loaded mashed potatoes, which came from the replicator only because the admiral insisted that the machine made the dish better than he did.Khan abandoned his coffee for a pint of artisan ale from a brewery in Roswell that Chris regularly patronized.They ate in companionable silence for a while before Chris finally asked, “So, how are you really doing, Khan?”

 

The Augment sighed and considered his response.“I’m struggling with the lack of control I have over my people’s current situation,” he replied honestly.“I’m not accustomed to not being able to secure the outcome I want through bribery, threat, or seduction.And I can’t say I have much confidence in the Federation’s benevolence where Augments are concerned.”

 

“I know that,” Chris replied, “and I’m doing all that I can.”

 

“I know you are.It’s just … unsettling.I’ve been responsible for them for so long, and I don’t want to let them down now.”

 

“You won’t.Even if the bid for asylum fails, there are other options — a foreign-registered ship, an independent colony.But those are further afield.”

 

“I had hoped to give them more than a lifetime aboard a starship.They’ve lived through that once already, and it’s no sort of life for a child.”He hadn’t forgotten that Su was pregnant.In fact, it was one of the things that preoccupied him the most.

 

“We’ll work through it.I’m not going to abandon them if things don’t work out the way we hope.One way or another, they’ll be taken care of.”

 

Khan nodded at that.It would be alright, he told himself.He had allies, and the legal team weren’t idiots.They would most likely address the petitions to the Andorians, whose cultural values would make them the most sympathetic to the Augments’ plight.It wasn’t hopeless.“How do you do it?” he asked after a moment.“How do you live with the uncertainty?”

 

“By having faith that everything will turn out as it should,” Chris answered.“I believe that when I signed on for this incarnation I agreed to be put in situations that would give me the opportunity to grow in ways that would benefit both me and the universe at large.And I believe that the same is true of everyone else.We’re all cells in the body of the Goddess.”

 

“That’s a nice way of looking at it.I can’t say I have much faith in anything these days.”

 

“You were raised Sikh, weren’t you?”

 

“Yes,” he answered.“My mother took special care to raise me in the faith, and after her death it was a defining part of my identity until my mid-teens.Then I learned that God doesn’t save people just because they believe in Him and obey His teachings.”

 

“What happened?”

 

Khan shook his head.“A story for another time, perhaps.”It wasn’t a pleasant tale.He’d much rather focus on other things.“What about you?Was there ever a time when you lost your faith?”

 

“I don’t think I’ve ever lost it,” Chris answered honestly.“But I have put it so far in the back of my mind that I forgot it was there.There was a lot of times in my life that spirituality wasn’t my highest priority.It wasn’t even in the top five.And that’s okay.It’s always waiting for me when I get back to it.I figure its job is to lift me up, not drag me down.If it becomes too much of a burden, it’s time to lay off the woo and get back to more concrete realities.Besides, Deity is just as present in the world regardless of whether you’re consciously interacting with it.You don’t have to constantly bombard yourself with mindfulness of the divine, and it’s probably dangerous if you do.Too much of anything is bad for you, and that includes religion.”

 

“I’ve certainly seen the truth of that,” Khan replied.Personally, if he was going to go for too much of something, it would be good food, fine wine, and beautiful lovers.“And speaking of excesses, have you made a decision yet about your excessive delay in contacting Captain Kirk?I’m sure he’d consider it a bona fide miracle if he heard from you, seeing as how you’re supposed to be dead.”

 

Chris chuckled, though it was a sad sound.“I’ve started that letter a dozen times and I never get more than a paragraph in before I can hear him yelling about what a sick joke it is.Then I think I should just comm him, and then I consider how shitty it would be to tell him I’m alive but not be anywhere nearby for him to get to me.”

 

“There’s never going to be a perfect way.And the longer you wait, the more it will hurt, I think.”

 

“That’s probably true.But oddly enough, it’s not him that I’m most concerned about.It’s Spock.”

 

“You’re afraid he might have an emotional outburst?”There was certainly precedent for that.

 

“Not so much that as disturbing a lingering trauma,” Chris replied.“He was mind-melded with me when I flatlined.He experienced death with me.It’s not going to be easy for him to resolve that experience with the current reality.He might need another mind-meld before he accepts the truth.”

 

Khan thought about that for a moment.Telepathic disjuncture was certainly a more complex phenomenon to deal with than simple grief.And the Vulcan did have a recent history of instability under stress, a fact Khan knew very well, having been on the receiving end of it.“So what you’re saying is that you prefer to be there in person to tell them you’re alive.”

 

“I think that’s the best choice for all involved.It’s just a matter of making that happen.”

 

“You’ll have a ship soon,” Khan pointed out.“With her advanced warp capabilities, the _Retribution_ is perfectly able to catch up to the _Enterprise_ in a timely fashion.You could manage Section 31’s affairs from onboard.You’d have to be commlinked in to meetings, of course, but it’s feasible.And if someone else were responsible for the day-to-day operations of the ship, you’d have more time to devote to other business.”

 

“All true,” Chris conceded.“It has its merits, I’m not denying that.I just hope that war doesn’t break out in the meantime.”That would change everyone’s plans quite a bit.“Dessert?I have pound cake, fresh strawberries, and real whipped cream.”

 

Khan took the offer for what it was: a polite change of subject.“Sounds delicious,” he replied with a smile.But he made a mental note to research what would happen to the _Enterprise_ in case war was declared.


	15. Chapter 15

Jim was already in the conference room, sipping his second cup of coffee and reading over the staff meeting agenda, when Spock came in.

 

“Good morning, Captain,” he greeted with his customary deference to his friend’s rank, and he took his seat to Jim’s right.

 

“Morning, Spock.”Jim was halfway to his morning caffeination goal, so he was feeling chipper.Not that staff meetings were his favorite thing ever, but he got to see everyone at the same time and catch up on the things going on around his ship.That had a little bit of entertainment value.

 

Sulu, Uhura, and Chekov filed in not long afterward, each offering their own salutations as they took their seats.Jim listened with half an ear as they chatted amongst themselves.Bones and Scotty were the last to arrive, as usual.The doctor shot a concerned glance at Jim as he entered the room, but said nothing as he took his seat to Jim’s left.

 

Jim started the meeting as usual, bidding them a formal good-morning and letting each of his senior officers give their departmental status report.He kept his poker face carefully in place, listening to each of his officers, responding where appropriate, offering encouragement or voicing concern where it was warranted.It all felt a bit too mechanical to him, and he was sure his facade was as transparent as he felt it was.Still, he went on as if everything was perfectly as it should be, waiting until the reports were concluded and they progressed to the ‘new business’ portion of the meeting.

 

“A matter has come to my attention that will affect the operational readiness of this ship,” he began slowly.“Two weeks ago, Dr. McCoy, in accordance with regulations governing the subject, disclosed a pregnancy among the crew to me.Dr. Marcus has taken some time to deliberate and she’s decided to continue her pregnancy, so we’ll be expecting a new member in our shipboard family in about 32 weeks.It is likely she will take the maximum maternity leave after she gives birth, but in the meantime, she’ll be on modified duty.This will primarily affect the Engineering and Science departments, so I’ll expect Mr. Scott and Mr. Spock to head up the accommodation efforts and present a readiness report to me within two weeks.

 

“That’s the routine part,” he continued.“The non-routine part is this: we will _not_ be putting in to port after Dr. Marcus gives birth.She has indicated very emphatically that she wishes to remain on board the _Enterprise_ to complete our mission, and I’ve decided to allow that.Therefore, we will be needing to make longterm accommodations for things like childcare and early childhood education.We’re a long way from the Federation, so we’re going to have to generate the resources we need from what we have on board.So let your people know that Dr. Marcus is going to be looking for babysitters come the new year.”

 

As expected, Spock was the first one to voice any sort of dissent.“Captain,” the Vulcan said, “this is highly irregular.The _Enterprise_ is on a mission of unprecedented duration in an uncharted region of space.It is unreasonable to expose a child to such dangers, and as commanding officer, it is your responsibility to see to the safety of every person on this ship, whether they are Starfleet officers or not.”

 

“And as a mother, it is Dr. Marcus’s responsibility to see to the safety of her child,” Jim answered calmly.“To interfere with that right would be sexist and paternalistic, and you can guess just how much of that Dr. Marcus would be willing to put up with.The fact of the matter is, she’s not placing her child in any more danger than she herself is already in, and, thus far, our mission has been less dangerous than anyone assumed it would be.There’s no reason to think it will magically get _more_ dangerous just because there’s a baby on board — a baby who will be attended to by a trained Starfleet officer at all times.”He was basically parroting back exactly what Carol had argued at him during their exhaustive discussions on the subject, but Spock didn’t need to know that.

 

“Nevertheless, Captain,” Spock pressed, “I believe it sets a dangerous precedent for others under your command who might find themselves in a similar situation.This is a ship of exploration and not designed to accommodate children.”

 

“Your concerns are understood and noted, but I’ve made my decision.We’re the first mission like this ever attempted, and we need to show Starfleet that we’re capable of completing that mission regardless of whatever personnel matters arise.”

 

Uhura posed the next question.“What about the father?Is he in the picture?”

 

“Dr. Marcus hasn’t disclosed the identity of the father,” Jim answered honestly.He was skating on thin ice here.He had to stick to the Official Version or else they’d both be in trouble — Carol for fraternizing outside of her rank allowance and Jim for being emotionally compromised about Carol’s pregnancy.“And I’m under the impression that she intends to be the primary caregiver and decisionmaker for her baby.If someone wants to claim paternity, I’m sure we’ll cross that bridge when we come to it, but right now, she considers herself a single parent.”

 

“It has to be one of the crew,” Chekov put in.“Can’t we use DNA to find out who it is?”

 

“That’s easy,” Bones answered before Jim could.“We are _able_ to, but we are not _permitted_ to.The genetic information of a fetus is considered part of the mother’s confidential health information, and access to the genetic information of a child is extremely limited, generally only to the legal parents and to the physicians treating the child.If Dr. Marcus doesn’t name a father and no one alleges paternity and passes testing, then she’s the only legal parent.And she may have her own reasons for that.”

 

Thankfully no one was gossip-hungry enough to speculate on those reasons, which Jim was beyond thankful for.He knew people would suspect him because he and Carol had generated a palpable amount of unresolved sexual tension between them before things had actually gotten _serious_.Some people had reason to suspect him more strongly than others, but there was nothing he could do about that.So long as he didn’t give an inch, everything would be okay.Right?“If there’s nothing further,” he said, “I think we’re ready to adjourn to our posts.Until next week, same time, same channel.”

 

For a moment, Spock looked as if he was ready to stay behind and needle Jim some more, but a significant look from Uhura seemed to change his mind.He got to his feet and made his way back to the bridge, followed closely behind by the comms officer, Sulu, and Chekov.Scotty followed them out the door, turning down the corridor toward the turbolift to go back to the engine room.

 

Only Bones remained, and he waited until the door closed before he spoke.

 

“You dodged more bullets than Keanu Reeves in that trilogy you like so much,” he said gruffly.“Don’t think it’ll last forever.Spock will call you out before too long and it’ll go all to hell.”

 

Jim couldn’t meet his friend’s eyes.Instead he stared at the closed door.“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

 

“The hell you don’t.Come to my quarters after shift.I’ll break out the good bourbon and you can confess your sins.”He didn’t wait for a response before he got up and walked out.He knew his friend well enough to know that Jim would mull it over throughout the day and be on his doorstep come 1800.

 

And mull it over Jim did.

 

He started out thinking that he wouldn’t go see Bones at all.He needed to stick to the Official Version of things and he couldn’t do that if Bones was going to interrogate him.By 1100, he’d weakened and decided that he’d go see his friend after all, but he wouldn’t tell him anything that wasn’t in the Official Version.He was stubborn enough to do that.This plan was good until about 1500, when he realized that Bones would probably keep plying him with alcohol and poking at open emotional wounds until he got the answers he was looking for.So Jim went back to Plan A and resolved to stay far away from the doctor’s quarters after shift.

 

And finally, around shift change at 1700, Jim remembered what a good friend Bones was and how he always felt better after talking to him and how much easier life would be if he had someone to bounce ideas off of and how Bones was known for stretching the bounds of doctor-patient confidentiality to cover things not necessarily having to do with medical treatment.It was one of the things that made Bones such a good friend/barkeep/confessor.

 

So sure enough, after grabbing some dinner, Jim was ringing Bones’s bell at 1800, newly resolved to telling the man what was on his mind without getting too much into Carol’s business.

 

“Knew you’d show up,” Bones said as he opened the door.“Neat or on the rocks?”

 

“Neat.”There was no sense in watering down perfectly good bourbon.He stepped inside and took his customary seat on the couch.


	16. Chapter 16

Bones passed a rocks glass half-full of bourbon to Jim, then poured one for himself and settled down on the couch beside his friend.“Today was easy,” he said without preamble.“It’s only going to get harder from here on in.You know how Spock is about the regulations.He won’t let it go.”

 

“You’re not even going to give me a chance to defend myself?” Jim asked, and he took a long sip of his drink.“You’re just going to assume I’m the father of Carol’s baby?”

 

“For all you know, I ran fetal DNA.”

 

“Did you?”There was a definite note of worry in his voice.

 

Bones took a sip of his drink.“Nope.Didn’t want a record of it on the system.But I don’t need DNA to tell me what’s obvious to anyone with two eyes and a lick of common sense.Ever since we started out on this mission, you and Carol have been doing the flirting-and-trying-to-hide-it bit.Then you take an away team to an uninhabited planet, send everyone else back to the _Enterprise,_ and stay alone together overnight while you fix the shuttlecraft.And when you come back, the two of you aren’t flirting and trying to hide it anymore.Instead, you’re suddenly very appropriate — too appropriate, like you’re hoping you won’t get caught at something.Now, either you and Carol had a very serious talk about the way things were going to be while you were planetside or you slept with her.My money’s on the latter.”

 

Jim sighed heavily and took another drink.“We’re really that obvious?”He’d sort of hoped they wouldn’t be, but if Bones was seeing it, then a whole lot of other people were seeing it too.Well, the people who had regular contact with him and Carol, anyway, which meant the senior staff, the bridge crew, some of engineering, and some of medical.There were 1100 people on board.Not everyone was going to see it directly, but scuttlebutt was a thing.

 

Suddenly, it struck him just how deep he was in all this.

 

“Fuck.”

 

Bones chuckled.“You did that already.It led to this.God only knows how.Maybe all those infusions of Khan’s super-blood screwed up your hormonal balance.”

 

“That explains me.What about Carol?”

 

“Even the best contraception isn’t perfect.We could go back and forth all night trying to isolate the exact cause but it doesn’t change the fact that it happened.”

 

“So what now?”

 

“You gonna help her?”

 

“Of course I’m gonna help her!She can’t do it alone.Besides, it’s my kid too.I can’t just ignore that.”

 

“No, you can’t.But you’ve got to be careful just how involved you get, for Carol’s sake.They reserve the right to discharge people for fraternization, and she really values her career.”

 

“I know that,” Jim said.“I know.”He really did.Carol believed in Starfleet.She embraced her family’s history with it.And she was a damn fine officer.Jim couldn’t take that away from her.“So I guess that means I’m gonna find away to be there without being obvious, which we’ve sort of established isn’t my forte where she’s concerned.”

 

“You’ve got that right,” Bones gruffed.“Spock is gonna logic it out same as I did.You’ve got to decide what you’re going to do when he confronts you about it.”

 

“I could lie.”

 

“It wouldn’t do any good.You know how he feels about that.”The last time Jim lied and Spock disagreed with it, it cost Jim his command.

 

“Well, the only other alternative is telling the truth, which will expedite the consequences.”And Jim didn’t like that idea one bit.

 

“There’s the middle ground, you know,” Bones said then.“Same one Carol took.”

 

“Huh?”

 

“You don’t know whether or not you’re the father of Carol’s baby.”

 

“He’s not an idiot.He’ll do the math and come up with an approximate date of conception.”

 

“Didn’t say you didn’t sleep with her.Said you don’t know whether you’re the father.”

 

“That sure makes her sound like the ship’s bike.”Jim didn’t like that at all.It made her sound too much like _him_ , which she totally wasn’t.“And it’s still fraternization.”

 

“She told me she didn’t know who the father was,” Bones said.“Believe me, she knew how it sounded when she said it.But what protects her could protect you too.And if he presses you, you can say you don’t want to know.It’s not like you haven’t avoided fatherhood all your post-pubescent life.Maybe that’ll be enough to satisfy Spock and he’ll drop it.”

 

“We can hope.”Jim finished his drink and reached for the bottle to pour another.“What if he doesn’t drop it?”

 

“Then he’ll still have to accept the fact that you’re the captain of this ship and you’re not going to file an allegation of fraternization.”

 

“At which point he’ll accuse me of abusing my authority because I’m inappropriately involved with a subordinate.”

 

“Yes, but will he endanger the good of this crew by making that allegation official?”Bones took the bottle from Jim and topped off his glass.“He’s got that Vulcan needs-of-the-many-outweigh-the-needs-of-the-few thing going.You could argue that the good of this ship overrules the adherence to the letter of the law.”

 

“And he could argue back that the good of Starfleet overrules the good of this ship.”He sighed.This was getting more complicated than he wanted to deal with right now.

 

“Maybe,” Bones responded.“But you have to admit that Spock’s changed since the last time the two of you had a proper argument over the right way to do things.He might surprise you.”

 

“Maybe,” Jim parroted back quietly.He sighed again.Definitely more complicated than he wanted to deal with.

 

Bones set the bottle of bourbon on the side table, then took another sip of his drink.“How are you really doing about all this?” he asked.“And don’t say ‘fine’ because I know you’re not.”

 

“I’m gonna be a father,” Jim answered, a bit of shock still evident in his voice.“I just have to get used to that.”He took another long drink from his glass.“I’m completely unprepared for this, Bones.”

 

“Nobody’s ever ready for it.Some are less unprepared than others, but there’s no way to really be ready to be a parent.”

 

Jim made a face.“Thanks for the support.”

 

Bones reached over and put a reassuring hand on Jim’s shoulder.“I’m here for you, Jim.I’m here for both of you.You’re not alone in this.”

 

“I just feel caged.And if I feel that way, I can only _imagine_ how Carol feels.”

 

“Stressed, definitely.But she’s holding up.She told me that you’ve been a big help.”

 

“She _told_ you that?When?”What else had she been saying?He thought they were supposed to be keeping their involvement a secret.

 

“When she told me about her final decision,” Bones explained.“She said that she couldn’t ask for a more supportive friend or captain and that you were a great help while she was talking herself through her options.”

 

He shrugged at that.“I don’t know, half the time I felt like I was arguing with her and the other half I felt like I was nodding my head and saying ‘uh-huh’ a lot.”

 

“Well, whatever you did, it seemed to be the right thing.”

 

“That’s good,” he said, relaxing.He certainly hadn’t wanted to make anything more difficult for Carol.She had enough on her plate as it was.

 

Bones took another sip of his drink.“So, impending parenthood aside, how do you feel about Carol?You’ve been carrying on for two months.For you, that’s practically going steady.”

 

Jim sighed.He had figured this question would come up eventually.This was his best friend he was talking to, after all.“I don’t know,” he answered with a shrug.“I mean, I care about her.I don’t want anything bad to happen to her.But I don’t know how serious I am about her either.”

 

“You’re letting her stay on board when any reasonable CO would transfer her to a safer posting.I’d say that’s pretty serious.”

 

“That’s because she’s a damn fine officer and the ship needs her expertise.And the _Enterprise_ can’t afford to jeopardize the validity of future five-year missions by putting in to port every time there’s a minor hiccup.”

 

“And it has nothing at all to do with the fact that you want to keep Carol close for fear that something might happen to her if you don’t.”

 

“What makes you say that?”

 

“Gaila.”

 

Jim stiffened.“This is completely different from that,” he said flatly.

 

“Is it?Regardless of your initial motivations for getting to know her, you liked that girl way more than you were ready to admit.And you lost her before you could tell her that.No one in the galaxy would blame you for not wanting to make the same mistake twice.”

 

“I just want Carol to not have to choose between being a mother and having a career, alright?This is a big enough ship that we can make accommodations for whatever she might need.So it’s unorthodox.Whatever.We can make it work.”

 

“I’m just suggesting that your actions indicate that you may feel more for her than you fully realize, and that’s something you may want to consider in the next several months.”

 

“Your opinion is noted.”

 

“Hey, don’t be that way,” Bones soothed.“I want you to be happy.And I want you to be able to defend yourself against your Vulcan first officer, because your emotional attachment to Carol is not going to be off-limits for him.”

 

“Tell me something I don’t know,” Jim said ruefully.

 

Bones replied without missing a beat.“Carol’s having a little girl.”


	17. Chapter 17

Jim woke up the next morning a bit dehydrated but not actually hungover.A good breakfast and an extra sweet cup of coffee fixed all of his lingering grogginess, and he showered and dressed and made his way to the bridge a little bit early to get the shift-change report from the Gamma Shift helmsman.He wasn’t surprised to find Spock already there; the Vulcan usually arrived on the bridge fifteen minutes before shift change.

 

“Good morning, Spock,” he greeted, raising his coffee cup in a friendly salute.

 

“Good morning, Captain,” the first officer responded without the slightest hint of geniality in his tone.“Once you’ve received the morning report, I would like to speak with you privately about a matter of some importance.”

 

So much for a nice start to the morning, Jim thought to himself.Still, Bones had warned him about it, and Jim hadn’t expected Spock to let it go in any case.“Of course,” he replied.“I’ll meet you in the ready room.”He took a sip of his coffee, then went to the helm to confer with Lieutenant Haines.

 

Five minutes later, Jim stepped into his ready room.Spock was standing there at parade rest, waiting for him.That only indicated to Jim how very important this discussion was to his XO.He was leaning heavily on protocol, which he did anyway, but they’d been friends long enough that the Vulcan usually relaxed his bearing around Jim when they were in private.

 

“This is about Carol Marcus,” Jim said as he made his way to his desk and leaned against it, facing Spock.

 

“It is,” the commander replied.“I wish to know the nature of your relationship with her.”

 

“And since when is that any of your business?”

 

“It is a matter of shipboard orderliness,” he replied.“She is an officer under your command, and you appear to be engaging in favoritism toward her.”

 

“Carol’s a good friend,” Jim said.“Let’s leave it at that.”

 

“Are you in an intimate relationship with her?”

 

So much for leaving it at that.Not that Jim had expected that to work anyway.“If I were in an intimate relationship with her, I certainly wouldn’t discuss it with you.”

 

“If you are,” Spock said, “then both you and she are in violation of regulations governing proper conduct between officers of disparate rank.”

 

“You’re one to talk,” Jim scoffed.“You were in an intimate relationship with Uhura when she was a _cadet_.Now you’re going to ride my ass because you suspect I’m doing the same thing?That’s called hypocrisy, Spock.”

 

“Nyota demonstrated an intellectual and emotional maturity well beyond her assigned rank, and she explicitly rejected the notion of using our relationship for personal or professional gain.”

 

“Oh, so the rules don’t apply if the woman you’re interested in is smart, confident, professional, and otherwise ethical.Nice to know.”

 

“Captain—“Spock stopped himself.“Jim,” he tried again.“Are you in a relationship with Carol Marcus?”

 

“I don’t think I want to answer that,” Jim replied.“The last thing she _or_ I need is someone holding allegations like that over our heads.If Starfleet hears of it, we could be discharged.That’s pretty heavy stuff to be playing around with.”

 

“I only ask so I can better understand the situation that prompted you to allow her to remain on board the _Enterprise_ after she gives birth.It is an unorthodox and dangerous course of action.”

 

“Have you _met_ me, Spock?I’m known for unorthodox and dangerous courses of action.This should come as no surprise to anybody.”

 

“You are correct.But you only undertake unorthodox and dangerous actions when they are for the greater good of your ship and crew.In this case, a helpless and innocent life is involved.”

 

Jim sighed.Of course Spock would say that.Like Jim hadn’t agonized over it enough already.“Spock,” he began, “Carol has her reasons for asking to remain on board, and I have my reasons for allowing it.Some of those reasons are professional in nature, and some of them, to be quite honest, are personal in nature.But believe me when I tell you that I think this course of action is in the best interest of Carol, her baby, and the crew at large.”

 

“Then why won’t you tell me the nature of your relationship with her?”

 

“Because before this is all over, you may have to answer direct questions about what you know, and I want you to be able to answer those questions in a way that won’t automatically destroy anybody’s career.You’ve got suspicions.You’re right to have suspicions.But suspicions are just suspicions, and they need to remain suspicions for the time being.”

 

Spock’s brow furrowed ever so slightly.It was clear he didn’t like the answer he was getting.“I understand,” he replied after a moment.“Jim, I hope that the time will come when we are able to discuss the particulars of this situation more fully and honestly.You are my friend.”

 

Jim nodded at that.“And you’re my friend, Spock,” he answered.“One day, we will talk about this, I promise.But right now, I can’t.Just trust my decision on this, okay?Believe me when I tell you that I’ve thought through every detail until I’m sick of it all.”That, at least, he was being perfectly and completely honest about.

 

Spock nodded in return.“Very well.With your permission, I will return to the bridge.”

 

Jim waved him off.“I’ll be there in a couple of minutes.”He waited until the door had closed behind the commander before he pulled out his communicator.“Kirk to McCoy.”

 

A moment later, the doctor answered him.“McCoy here.What’s up, Jim?”

 

“I just had that conversation we were talking about yesterday.It was shorter than expected.And less pointed.”

 

“You should be worried, then.Give Dr. Marcus a heads-up.”

 

“You keep a look out yourself.”

 

“I will.Have a good shift.”

 

“Will do.Kirk out.”


	18. Chapter 18

As ways to die went, this one was downright shitty, Khan thought to himself as he sat in the cockpit of the _Sarina_ and tried to get his bearings.With both nacelles blown and the impulse engine apparently nonexistent, he wasn’t going anywhere any time soon.He drifted amidst the wreckage of his targets, one tiny fighter among bits and pieces of two birds-of-prey who’d been on the wrong side of the Neutral Zone.The targets had been dealt with, but a couple of lucky shots from the Klingons had made it a pyrrhic victory for Khan.Now he had no engines, no comms, and barely enough power to keep life support going.

 

At least the automated distress beacon still worked, he consoled himself as he pulled the seatback lever and reclined as much as he could, looking out the transparent aluminum windows at stars and rubble.There were colony worlds nearby, though they were in disputed territory and it would be difficult to predict whether they had the resources or inclination to attempt a rescue mission.There was also a space station, but Khan didn’t expect assistance from them.Deep Space K-7 was on high alert, and they had their own fighters and shuttles to keep track of.The most they could do would be to contact a nearby starship and request their assistance.

 

Which brought Khan to the other edge of this double-edged sword.Less than four light-years away from K-7 was a Klingon outpost, and Khan would bet real money that they knew about those birds-of-prey.They would send someone looking when they didn’t return as expected, and while Klingons weren’t much for rescue missions, they did like to keep their technology out of Federation hands.When they got here to destroy the evidence, Khan would count himself lucky if they blew him out of the stars along with the rest of the flotsam.

 

It was only a matter of time before someone found him.Whether that would be the Klingons or the Federation or some opportunistic third party, he couldn’t say.Whether that would be before or after his life-support failed, he also couldn’t say.And for someone who was accustomed to having all the answers, that was aggravating as hell.

 

After months of tiptoeing around the subject, after exhausting every diplomatic option available, the Federation Council had voted last week to declare a state of war with the Klingon Empire — or, more accurately, they had formally acknowledged that a state of war already existed as far as the Klingons were concerned.It hadn’t affected Khan’s situation very much.When he wasn’t on Earth, he and his people were in their attack fighters, running stealth strikes across the Neutral Zone or making incursions deeper into Klingon space to gather information or destroy specific targets.Until now, all his missions had been flawless successes.

 

He should’ve known better than to take perfection for granted.

 

Khan sighed and sat up again, scooting the seat backward and opening up a panel.He could pass the time by working on the comms.That way, if help arrived, he would be able to talk to them.And if whoever arrived wasn’t help, well, he was perfectly capable of saying his farewells in Klingon.

 

~~~~~~~~~

 

Jim leaned forward in his chair on the bridge, studying the starscape on the viewscreen.Ever since he had gotten the message from Starfleet Command that they’d been recalled due to war, they had been at warp, making their way back to Federation space.Their destination was the Aldebaran system and the Starfleet installation there.He expected to be assigned a patrol once they arrived and then the real work would begin, but there was a part of him that hoped it would be a hurry-up-and-wait scenario.He could use a rest, and he was sure his people could too.

 

Especially Carol.

 

She was well into her pregnancy now.Twenty-two weeks and change.Aside from feeling like she never got quite enough sleep, she was doing well — or, at least, that was what she told Jim, and he hadn’t heard differently from anyone else.He hadn’t apprised Starfleet of her status, but it was something they were going to have to talk about before they got to Aldebaran.Keeping her on a ship of exploration was one thing, but a ship at war?He simply wasn’t willing to do that.The danger was too great.And he hoped that she would agree with him on that.

 

“Captain,” Uhura reported then, rattling Jim from his thoughts, “I’m picking up an automated distress signal in the Donatu sector.”

 

He swiveled his chair toward her.“Federation?” he asked.

 

“It appears to be, sir,” she told him.“I’m trying to hail them now.So far, no response.”

 

He swiveled his chair toward the helm.“Scan for ships in the area,” he ordered Sulu.

 

The helmsman went to work.“No ships in the surrounding area.I can’t even be sure of the existence of the ship sending the signal.”

 

“It could be a trap,” Spock suggested from his place at the science station.

 

That was something that made a lot of sense.Jim wouldn’t put it past the Klingons to fake a distress signal in order to draw ships in.“Shields up,” he ordered.“Plot course to intercept.Alert Medical to prepare to receive survivors.And keep trying to raise that ship.”

 

“Aye, sir,” came the simultaneous replies from Sulu and Uhura.Sulu added, “Time to destination: six minutes, fourteen seconds.”

 

It was a couple of minutes before Uhura reported again.“Captain, I have a channel open, but I’m getting intermittent static.I don’t know if they can hear us, but we definitely can’t hear them.”

 

Jim’s brow furrowed.“Put it on speakers.”A moment later, he heard the crackle and hiss of blown microphones trying to transmit sound.Every so often, there was a shadow of a real voice.“This is Captain James T. Kirk of the _USS Enterprise_.We are en route to your location.If you can hear us, please acknowledge.”

 

For a moment, the static on the line went completely silent.Then it came back.Short short short.Long long long.Short short short.

 

Jim’s Morse code was a little rusty, but that was one pattern anyone could recognize.It meant that Jim’s words had been heard, but it also meant that whoever was in need of help was most likely human.“We hear you.We’ll be there in three minutes.Standby on this channel.”

 

Short short short.Long long long.Short short short.

 

When they dropped out of warp, Jim was glad he’d already ordered the shields up because there was debris everywhere.Chekov quickly pinpointed the source of the distress signal.“Keptin, I am detecting one human life sign in the wreckage.”

 

He pressed a button on his seat console to reactivate the connection to the distressed ship.“This is the _Enterprise_.Prepare for transport.”Then he closed the channel.“Lower shields.Chekov, send those coordinates to the transporter room.Then see if you can tractor beam that little ship into the shuttle bay.”

 

“Aye-aye, sir,” the ensign responded.

 

“Spock, you have the conn.”Jim got out of his seat and made his way off the bridge and to the transporter room.When he got there, the two security guards that Jim would’ve expected to be there were not flanking the door.That was his first clue that something was wrong.Then he stepped inside and saw why they weren’t at their post.They were both pointing their phasers at Khan Noonien Singh, who was standing calmly on the transporter pad.Bones and his two nurses were standing behind the transporter techs, though Jim could see that Bones was near an open weapons panel, ready to grab the phaser there if the situation turned ugly.

 

All of these facts served to ground Jim in the reality that it was _Khan_ on the transporter pad.The Augment looked unsurprised to be in this situation, but he seemed to be making no provocative moves.“Ah, Captain,” he greeted.“Thank you for the rescue.It’s a pleasure to be aboard the _Enterprise_ again.”

 

That tone was smug and irritating to Jim’s ears, and he gritted his teeth for a moment before he collected himself and spoke coldly.“I don’t know how you got out here, but I promise you, the only place you’re going is back to Earth so Starfleet can put you back in the hole you crawled out of.”

 

That seemed to amuse Khan.His lips quirked in something that wasn’t quite a smirk.“I assure you, Captain, that won’t be necessary.My ship is stationed in the Betazed system.My commanding officer will be very pleased to have me back on board.”

 

“Your _ship_?Since when do you have a ship?”

 

“Since I was revived to fight the Klingons,” he replied easily.“The ship is the _USS Retribution_.She’s under the command of Captain Claire Sheridan.She’ll see to it that my direct commanding officer is notified of my status.”

 

Jim was hearing the words.His brain was even processing them.But he couldn’t _believe_ it.Starfleet was just letting Khan roam around unsupervised?It defied logic!“Look,” he said, “I’m sure there’s a reasonable explanation for all of this.But until I figure out what that is, you’re going to cool your jets in the brig.”He stepped toward the transporter console and hit the comm button.“Kirk to Security: I need a full team dispatched to the transporter room immediately for prisoner transport.”

 

“Prisoner,” Khan purred lowly.“Really, Captain, is that really necessary?”

 

Jim shot him a glare.“Until I hear from someone who isn’t you that your presence here is sanctioned, you’re detained for purposes of shipboard security.”

 

“Considering our history, I can’t say that’s an unreasonable precaution.”The Augment seemed completely unconcerned about Jim’s pronouncement.“You’ll have my cooperation, of course.I wouldn’t want to inconvenience you more than absolutely necessary.”

 

Jim couldn’t tell whether Khan was being snide or serious, but he couldn’t imagine the man being the slightest bit accommodating.He didn’t respond, and the silence only grew more tense until the security team arrived.Khan stepped down from the transporter pad and allowed himself to be shackled and escorted out of the room.Never once did he appear to be anything less than perfectly calm about the situation.

 

Once the redshirts had vacated the room, Bones closed the weapons panel and asked, “What the hell is going on, Jim?”

 

“I don’t know,” the captain replied.“But you’re going to help me find out.Once he’s processed, go and assess him.I doubt he has any serious injuries, but it’ll give you a chance to ask him what happened.In the meantime, I’ll get a hold of Starfleet and see what they want me to do.”

 

“You think he’s really here legitimately?”

 

“I don’t know.But I’m going to find out.”


	19. Chapter 19

Jim sat at his desk in the captain’s ready room, drumming his fingers on the textured surface and staring at the Starfleet insignia on the desktop viewscreen, willing it to change to the face of this Captain Sheridan.Uhura was at her station on the bridge, working on establishing contact, and she would be patching him through soon enough.He knew that she was working as quickly as possible, but he was still impatient.He wanted _answers_.And he wanted them sooner rather than later.

 

Suddenly the screen changed and a brunette in her mid-fifties appeared.“Captain Kirk,” she greeted in a reserved tone.“I understand you have a matter of some urgency that you wish to discuss with me.”

 

“That’s correct,” he said, and he leaned forward in his seat and stilled his fingers.“Half an hour ago, my ship responded to an automated distress signal in the Donatu sector.We recovered one person and the remains of what appears to be a warp-capable fighter craft.However, the identity of that person is troublesome: it’s Khan Noonien Singh.And he alleges that he’s stationed on your ship.”

 

“That’s correct,” Sheridan replied evenly.“Commander Singh is periodically stationed on the _Retribution_ as part of his regular duties.He was away on a mission and we had not heard from him.Is he alright?”

 

“My CMO is with him now,” Jim answered, “but he appears none the worse for wear.How long has he been stationed with you?”

 

The other captain smiled politely.“That’s not a question I can answer for you, I’m afraid.It’s classified.”

 

“Wonderful,” Jim replied flatly.“Anything you _can_ tell me?Because I’m trying to understand why a known terrorist is traipsing around in a Starfleet uniform.”His displeasure with that fact was more than evident by his tone.

 

“I can understand why it would be upsetting to you — and to a lot of people, for that matter.However, that would be a question better directed to Admiral Sean Hunter.Still,” Sheridan continued, “I am very eager to have Commander Singh back aboard.I’ll be happy to rendezvous at a location convenient to you to take him off your hands.”

 

Jim wasn’t happy with the lack of answers.But he had a name.That was better than nothing.“We’re en route to Aldebaran,” he replied.“If you can meet us there, we can transfer Khan and what’s left of his spacecraft to you while we resupply.”

 

Sheridan nodded.“Very well.We’ll be there.I’ll apprise Admiral Hunter of the situation and let him know to expect your call.I am sorry I can’t be more help.”

 

“It’s just the San Fran two-step,” Jim replied, sounding unsurprised.

 

“We all have to dance it from time to time,” Sheridan agreed.“Thanks for taking care of my crewman.I’ll see you soon.Sheridan out.”The screen reverted to the Starfleet insignia a moment later, and Jim leaned back in his seat with a heavy sigh.

 

“Damn,” he muttered to himself.It was looking for all the world like Khan was actually supposed to be out of cryosleep and working for Starfleet.It must be a cold day in Hell, he thought to himself.Either that or he’d pissed off some especially sadistic higher power.He supposed he’d find out soon enough.

 

Now, to find out who this Admiral Hunter was.

 

~~~~~~~~~

 

“Well,” Bones pronounced as he put his scanner away, “if you had any injury, you’ve already healed from it.I’m giving you a clean bill of health.”

 

Khan nodded in agreement and put his arms down.“I expected as much,” he replied.“The burns were minor in the first place.I think the only real casualty of today’s misadventure were my nerves.It’s rather unsettling to be adrift in space.”

 

“You’ll get no argument from me on that.”Bones wouldn’t be able to handle something like that with near as much calm as the Augment had.“Now then, what’s this thing in your back?”

 

“Transponder,” Khan answered.“It’s a condition of my release.Starfleet likes to know where I am.”

 

“Can’t blame them for that.”

 

“I really can’t,” the Augment agreed.

 

“So,” Bones started, “any chance you can tell me what you were doing out there?”

 

“Hunting,” Khan answered with a smirk.“Some friends of mine were off doing something sneaky.My job was to make sure they didn’t get caught.I was returning to my ship when I came across a Bird-of-Prey.I attacked, but a second one de-cloaked and attacked me.I destroyed both targets, but my fighter was severely damaged.That’s how you found me.”

 

“Some friends you have if they didn’t come back for you.”

 

“They had already gone to warp, and fighters aren’t really equipped for rescue operations at any rate.I’m sure they’re back at the _Retribution_ now, just hearing about what happened.”

 

“I’m sure the story’s worth a round of drinks and a cigar.Crazy man attacks two ships full of Klingons, amazingly lives to tell about it.”

 

“It wouldn’t be the first time,” Khan said with a soft chuckle.

 

“You mean you do this regularly?”Somehow Bones wasn’t surprised.

 

“I’d answer that, but it’s classified.”

 

“Of course it is.”He shook his head and changed the subject.“I’ll report to the captain.I’m sure he’ll have some questions of his own for you.”

 

“I’d think less of him if he didn’t.”

 

Bones opened the cell aperture wide enough for Khan to step through and waved the Augment inside.“When was the last time you ate?” he asked.

 

“Before I left the _Retribution_ ,” Khan answered.“About eight hours ago.”

 

“I’ll have the galley send something up.After all you’ve been through today, you could use a real meal.”

 

Khan arched a brow.“Why, Doctor, could it be that you’re being _hospitable_?Whatever will the rest of the crew think?”

 

“You’re a patient.I’m duty-bound to see to your health and well-being.”He paused, considering, then continued.“But beyond that, you saved Jim’s life.I figure that’s worth a hot meal and an extra ration of tea, don’t you?”

 

“I won’t turn it down,” the Augment answered.“Thank you,” he added genuinely.

 

“Don’t mention it,” Bones replied, and he made his way to the computer access panel to make good on his offer.

 

~~~~~~~~~

 

_Hunter, Sean B.Admiral.Special Advisor to the Chief of Starfleet Intelligence.Duty Station: Starfleet Headquarters, San Francisco, California, Earth.End of record._

 

Jim looked at the very brief directory entry.There was no picture, no biography, no record of previous duty stations.His own directory entry was longer than this.He could understand if the man’s duty history had been redacted for security purposes.The man _was_ involved with Starfleet Intelligence.But the near-total lack of information that should otherwise be public record was disconcerting.

 

Jim opened a new screen and ran a search through the reports database.The only results he got were within the year.And the only mention of the man in the newsfeeds was a brief on his appointment to his current post.There was no history to be had, no footprints that would be left by an officer traveling through the ranks.It was like the man hadn’t existed before this year.

 

And Jim had seen that sort of thing before.With Khan.It made him very suspicious.

 

Still, he composed a very calm and professional message inquiring after the status of one Khan Noonien Singh, who alleged to have a commander’s rank and a billet on the _USS Retribution_.Given the irregularity of the situation, as he had responded to the man’s distress call and was now hosting him aboard the _Enterprise_ , he wanted to know how best to proceed without inadvertently disrupting the plans of other areas of Starfleet, et cetera, et cetera.

 

It was one of Jim’s finer works of bullshit.

 

He polished the message and had the computer transmit it via a priority coded channel.He figured that was an acceptable level of security considering the contents of the message and its recipient.Once that was done, he leaned back in his chair and sighed.He needed to go see Khan.And that was just about the last thing he wanted to do right now.

 

Seeing the Augment in a flight suit with command gold accents made his stomach turn.Khan had no right to wear that uniform after all the things he’d done to damage all it represented.And the fact that he had a rank of significant seniority only made Jim’s feelings on the matter more polarized.On this ship, it meant Khan was subordinate only to Jim and Spock.And that was unacceptable to him.

 

But ignoring the fact that Khan was here wasn’t going to solve the problem.So he might as well get off his ass and go down to the brig and talk to the man.But he’d stop by Bones’s office on the way to see if the man had learned anything useful.

 

~~~~~~~~~

 

Khan was laying on the bunk in his cell, one arm tucked behind his head as he dozed.His meal had been very filling and now that he was fed, he was actually a little sleepy.It was unsurprising.He’d been running on adrenaline since he’d engaged the Klingons.He had almost drifted into dreams when the sound of the door opening and the security guards hopping to attention told him that Captain Kirk had arrived.

 

“Khan.On your feet.”

 

Well, the Augment thought, the captain was clearly _not_ in the best of moods.He rolled to his feet and made his way to the front of the cell.“Captain,” he greeted.“I trust you’ve made contact with my ship.”

 

“I have,” the man replied.

 

“And?”

 

“And Captain Sheridan will be meeting us at Aldebaran to take possession of you and your spacecraft, at which point I will happily put you in my rear-view mirror.Until that time, you are staying in here because I don’t want to be responsible for the chaos that giving you free rein to wander my ship would cause.”

 

“Understandable, but unnecessary.The only place I would be wandering would be to the shuttlebay to assess the condition of my fighter.”

 

“From what I hear, it’s a miracle it didn’t break up while it was tractored aboard.It’s got no warp nacelles, no impulse engine, barely any thrusters — and it’s very nearly a radiation hazard.”

 

“Still, it speaks to the effectiveness of its design that it wasn’t completely obliterated during the firefight.”

 

“You have got to be the luckiest sonofabitch in the quadrant,” Jim remarked.“And I’ve got to be the _unluckiest_ one to have come across you.Believe me, if I’d known who it was calling for help, I would’ve left you there to die and lost not a single wink of sleep over it.”

 

Khan’s lips curved in a soft smile.“Oh, I do doubt that, Captain.You’re not a murderer.”

 

“And you _are_ ,” Jim snarled, raising his voice more than was probably necessary to get his point across.“You blew up a building full of innocent people, and you used our own response protocol to gather _more_ innocent people together so you could shoot them!Then you killed the head of Starfleet in cold blood, and _then_ you killed _thousands_ of people when you crashed your ship into San Francisco!”

 

“All true,” the Augment replied calmly.“And the Federation’s response to that was to return me to cryosleep indefinitely.It was a death sentence without actually being a death sentence.Fortunately for me, someone with a more _enlightened_ sense of justice came along and decided that even mass murderers deserve a chance to rehabilitate themselves.”

 

“It was a choice that should have been left to the courts.”

 

“Sometimes extraordinary measures must be taken in times of extreme threat.”

 

Jim’s expression darkened then.He’d come across that phrasing before, when he’d turned his investigative skills to the task of figuring out exactly what Section 31 was.It came from the Starfleet Charter — Article 14, Section 31, to be precise.It was, as far as Jim had been able to tell before he’d been thoroughly shut out of all information on the topic, the legal justification for the clandestine security organization’s existence.“Is that how you came to work for Admiral Hunter?” he asked after a moment.

 

“Admiral Hunter offered me an alternative to death by cryosleep.That alternative wasn’t without its conditions, but on the whole his offer was acceptable to me, so I took him up on it.”

 

“And who is he to be making such offers to you?”

 

“That’s classified, but I’m sure you’ll discover the truth before too much longer.”

 

“You know, your failure to cooperate is not winning you any brownie points here.”

 

“I’ve done nothing but cooperate, Captain.There are simply things that I know that are not my place to tell you.So, until my commanding officer comes along and tells me that I may discuss those matters with you, they remain confidential.”

 

“I could order you to tell me.”

 

“You could.And I would disobey that order because I have orders from someone of superior rank to you not to disclose what I know to those who have no need for that information.So I’m afraid pulling rank in this case would be entirely ineffective.”

 

Jim made himself unclench the fists that his hands had curled into.This was infuriating.But if he let it get to him then Khan won.And Khan wasn’t going to win.He took a breath and blew it out slowly.“Can’t blame me for trying,” he said with a halfhearted smile.

 

“Oh, if you hadn’t tried, I would’ve been very concerned indeed,” Khan assured him.“I sympathize with your situation.My only advice to you at this point is to be patient.It’s very likely that the answers you seek will come to you rather than having to be sought out.”

 

Jim almost asked what Khan meant by that, but he figured he’d get a vague and cryptic response that would do nothing to illuminate the situation, and he wasn’t in the mood for more riddles.“Right,” he said instead.“Anything else you feel like sharing before I leave you to your rest?”

 

Khan actually considered that for a moment.“Anything I could tell you at this point would either steer you in the wrong direction or leave you more confused than enlightened, so no.”

 

“Very well.”He turned and moved toward the door, making his way out and heading in the direction of the bridge.He was happy to put some distance between himself and the Augment.Right now he had more questions than answers and he felt like punching something till he felt better.Which he would probably do later.But for the moment he was content to see if his message had been responded to yet.

 

~~~~~~~~~

 

_TO: Capt. J. Kirk, USS Enterprise_

_FROM: Lt. K. Murakami, USS Retribution_

 

_Captain Kirk, Admiral Hunter will meet with you personally on board the USS Retribution once Commander Singh is aboard.Any questions you have about the commander or his current duties will be answered at that time.The contents of this message are classified.End of message._

 

Jim read the communiqué, feeling annoyed with the entire thing.The man couldn’t be bothered to respond personally?Jim was seriously losing respect for this admiral.On the other hand, if he went with his tin-foil-hat conspiracy theory, maybe that’s why the man’s yeoman did all the secretarial drudgery.Maybe the admiral didn’t exist at all except on paper.

 

No, that didn’t make any sense.Who would he be meeting with if there wasn’t some real person involved?He supposed he would find out soon enough.He apparently had a command appearance on the _Retribution_ in a couple of days.

 

Wonderful.

 

Couldn’t anything be straightforward anymore?


	20. Chapter 20

Jim walked onto the bridge, feeling — and hopefully not _looking_ — like thirty miles of bad road.His sleep had been broken and plagued with nightmares of Khan and the conference room and the warp core and dying.Finally, he’d gotten up before his alarm went off to avoid another round of torture.He’d taken a shower and gone to the gym to work off the weariness, then taken another shower and put on his duty uniform.He hadn’t felt much like breakfast, but he’d grabbed a cup of coffee and an apple all the same.He didn’t want to let on that he was a bit rough today.

 

He said his usual good-mornings and got the change-of-shift report from the officer of the watch, then settled in to the captain’s chair to sip at his coffee and mull over the day’s to-do list.They would be arriving at Aldebaran Colony at around 1400, at which time he would be reporting to the admiral stationed there.What would come of that, he didn’t know, but it would be a couple of days before they could go off and _do_ anything because resupplying the ship would take that long.And, of course, there was the matter of the _Retribution_ and getting Khan the hell off this ship, which would necessitate another meeting with another admiral.

 

Jim wasn’t sure how he felt about the whole thing.Obviously he wanted Khan as far away from him as possible, but contradictorily he didn’t want the man out of his line of sight.Too bad keeping the Augment in the brig indefinitely wasn’t an option.On the other hand, for Jim’s mental health, it was probably a good thing that Khan would be gone in the foreseeable future.Jim had enough on his plate without heaping an extra serving of stress and trauma on top of it all.

 

“Permission to come on the bridge?”

 

Jim turned in his seat to see Carol standing just outside the turbolift doors, waiting politely for permission before she took another step.“Granted,” he replied, offering her a soft smile.“You don’t often venture up here, Dr. Marcus.What’s the occasion?”

 

She made her way down to him before she answered.“Captain, is it true that Khan is on board?”

 

Well, shit.Not how he wanted to start his shift, but alright.He could deal with this.“It is,” he answered calmly.“That distress call we picked up yesterday was him.He’s in the brig for his safety as well as everyone else’s.”

 

“I want to see him, sir.”

 

“And you want my blessing before you go.”

 

“This is one situation where I’d rather ask permission than beg forgiveness,” she explained.“He killed my father, sir.I have a right to confront him, and this might be my only chance.”

 

“Fair enough,” Jim conceded.“I’ll call down to the brig and let them know you’re coming.But under no circumstances are you to be on the same side of the glass as him.You’re just going to have to imagine slapping the smirk off his face.”

 

“Of course, sir.”She sounded like she genuinely agreed with him on that point.That was good.He didn’t want to endanger her or the baby.

 

“Go on,” he said, and he offered her what he hoped was an encouraging smile.“Take all the time you need.But keep in mind that once we reach Aldebaran he’ll be on standby for transport.”

 

She smiled back at him, a gesture he found reassuring despite it all.“Yes, sir.Thank you.”Then she turned and made her way back to the turbolift.Jim let the door close behind her before he commed the brig and authorized Dr. Marcus for several hours of visitation time to use as she saw fit.That done, he sighed and went back to sipping his coffee.

 

He could see a long talk with Carol in his future.He knew her well enough to know that she’d want to discuss what happened in the brig after shift was over.He just hoped there would be time in his schedule for dinner and decompressing.He wanted to be there for her, but right now he was at the beck and call of not one but two admirals.He knew she’d understand if duty called, and he loved that about her, but he didn’t want to abuse the privilege either.

 

God, even his inner monologue was starting to sound like a mature and responsible person in an emotionally significant relationship.He’d better watch it or he’d be hopelessly obvious to everyone.And that would be just what he needed now that his command was going to be under closer scrutiny.He hoped that wherever Carol ended up once she left the _Enterprise_ , she made lieutenant-commander in short order so they could dispense with the fiction that they weren’t involved.It was really starting to wear on him.

 

On second thought, fuck duty.When Sulu got here, he’d have him slow the ship down so they got to Aldebaran at some early hour of tomorrow morning.He needed tonight with his girl.Maybe that would chase the nightmares away.

 

~~~~~~~~~

 

Khan sat cross-legged in the middle of his cell, hands cradled in his lap.His eyes were closed, and his breathing was deep and even.He listened to the sounds of the ship: the hum of the warp engine, the footsteps of people outside, the quiet snippets of conversation, the breathing of the security guards at their station.The doors opened and Khan heard the footfalls of someone approaching the security guards.He didn’t react.

 

“Dr. Marcus.The captain said you’d be coming.”

 

Interesting.A visitor.Khan called to mind an image of the admiral’s daughter, remembering what she looked like the last time he’d seen her and studying that vision for a moment, then he opened his eyes.What he saw took him by surprise.She was visibly pregnant.And in her eyes, staring back at him, was a storm of determination and anger.

 

He got to his feet and made his way to the front of the cell.“Dr. Marcus.To what do I owe the pleasure?”

 

“I wanted to hear from the lion’s mouth why you killed my father,” she answered forthrightly.

 

“I believe you’ll find my statement filed with the rest of the evidence that was presented at my trial.”

 

“I know what your statement says.I’m not asking for your confession.I’m asking for the reason _why_.”

 

He chuckled lowly and shook his head.“My dear, if I told you the truth, it would change your perception of your father in ways I’m not sure you want, especially with a little one on the way.”

 

One of her hands went to cradle the side of her belly, as if reassuring herself that her child was safe.It gave Khan a bit of satisfaction to know he’d intimidated her.“I’ll be the judge of that,” she answered coldly.“Now tell me.”

 

“Very well.Your father was a power-hungry predator who had no qualms about using human lives as bargaining chips.It didn’t take very long at all for me to realize that he was using the promise of reviving my people as a lure to ensure my cooperation.Had it been under other circumstances, I might have applauded him for it.After all, he’d managed to bring the greatest Augment mind in history thoroughly under his control.But you see, once he got a taste of that sort of power, he didn’t just use it to make me build ships and weapons.He used it to coerce me into experiments as well.And when the novelty of that wore off, he used it for his own twisted pleasure, knowing that I wouldn’t fight back lest my people be harmed.So, Dr. Marcus, the reason why I killed your father because the only way to stop a sadistic rapist is to render him completely and permanently powerless, and quadriplegia was far too lenient a punishment for him after all he’d done to me.”

 

No response was forthcoming, and it gave Khan no small amount of pleasure to know he’d shocked her into silence.It was a good twenty seconds before she spoke.“He raped you?”

 

“Multiple times.I can recount the exact details if you’d like.”Alright, perhaps he was feeling a bit sadistic himself, but amusements were few and far between in the brig.

 

She shook her head.“Why didn’t you say anything at your trial?” she pressed.

 

“Oh, come now.I have my pride.The man was dead; there was no reason to bring it up.It wouldn’t have made any difference in my sentencing.Believe me when I say I’d rather be known as the man who killed Admiral Marcus than the man who fell victim to his lust for domination.”

 

“So why are you here now?You’re supposed to be in cryosleep.”

 

“I’m sure you don’t have the security clearance for that,” he answered.“Suffice it to say that someone found a use for me.”

 

“And when we get to Aldebaran you’ll just … go back to what you were doing?”

 

“Without a doubt,” he replied.

 

She was silent for another long moment.It amused Khan that he could almost see her blood pressure rising.Clearly, despite her shock at the full extent of her father’s treatment of him, she was more concerned with the fact that Khan would be getting away practically scot-free.Finally she asked, “Who is your commanding officer?”

 

“What makes you think I have one?” he asked in reply.

 

“You have to answer to somebody.Who is it?”Her voice was low and steady, but anger was more than evident in her tone.

 

He considered her demand for a moment, then decided that the damage she could do with that information was limited at best.“Admiral Sean Hunter,” he answered.“But you won’t persuade him to put me back into cryosleep.”

 

“No, but I can damn well give him a piece of my mind.”

 

“I’m sure he’ll take your words into consideration, Doctor.”Far more than she realized, certainly, considering the sort of person he was.He watched as Carol turned and made her way out of the brig, he assumed on a mission to dispatch a scathing communiqué to the admiral before the man’s first coffee break.

 

Let her have her angry words, he thought as he stepped backwards to the center of the cell and sat back down to continue his meditation.She’d eat those words soon enough.

 

~~~~~~~~~

 

When Jim got back to his quarters after shift, Carol was already there.He’d given her an access code months ago, but he’d never known her to actually use it.“Is it too much to hope that your day was bland and uneventful?” he asked as he shrugged out of his gold shirt and toed off his boots.Those were always the first things to go when he got off duty.

 

“It was,” she answered, “except for the part about Khan.”

 

“Yeah,” Jim agreed, “he does that to people.I barely got any rest last night.Nightmares.”He moved over to the sofa and sat down, pulling Carol into his arms once he got settled.“So, did you get the answers you were looking for?”

 

“No.And yes.I wanted to know why he killed my father, and he was very frank on that point.”

 

“But?”

 

She hesitated then shook her head.“He said my father raped him.More than once.”

 

Serves the bastard right, Jim thought uncharitably.Then he immediately felt guilty for wishing something so vile on anyone, even an enemy.“Do you believe him?”

 

“I don’t know what to believe.But it makes me wonder.”

 

“Wonder what?”

 

“Whether my father slowly went power-mad, or whether he was always that way and I just never knew it.”

 

Jim didn’t have the answer to that.He certainly didn’t have warm, fuzzy feelings for Admiral Marcus.The man had been fully intent on killing him and his crew, and he demonstrably had no qualms about going against Starfleet regulations, Federation policy, and common sense in order to advance his own agenda — which was something Jim respected in a bizarre way, but at least _he_ had people to pull him back when he went too far off the straight and narrow.“You could ponder that question for the rest of your life and still not have an answer you’d be satisfied with,” he pointed out after a few moments.“It’s probably not a road you want to go down.”

 

“You’re right,” she agreed.“But Khan was right too; it’s certainly changed my perception of my father.Before, I felt guilty that the last words I said to him were that I was ashamed to be his daughter.Now, I feel like those words were justified.”

 

“Then you believe Khan more than you don’t believe him,” he remarked.

 

“I guess I do,” she mused.Then she sighed again.“It just makes me wonder what I’m supposed to tell our daughter about her grandfather.”

 

“What makes you think you have to tell her anything?All families have secrets, things that children don’t learn till they’re grown or till someone’s on their deathbed.Just say that he was a proud man who stood up for what he believed in.That much is the truth.Think of it this way, he’s not the grandfather they name buildings and shuttlecraft after.You’ll have way more fun regaling the little one with the story of the _Kelvin_ and why George Kirk is a household name.”

 

Carol smiled softly at that.“You’re a household name too, you know,” she said.“The only reason they don’t name buildings and shuttlecraft after you is because you’re still alive.”

 

“And I’ll be putting a clause in my will that nobody’s allowed to elevate me to any kind of heroic deityhood even after I kick off.”He didn’t want any child of his having to live under the same shadow of greatness that he’d had to endure.

 

She chuckled at that.“What are you going to do, haunt everyone who does it anyway?” she teased.

 

“I might!” he agreed with a soft laugh.He was glad for the lighthearted turn of conversation.They both needed the relief from dark and brooding thoughts.

 

“I can just imagine you haunting some Starfleet building somewhere.You’d be making the ship models fly off their lines and blasting the Beastie Boys all over the comms.”

 

“And I will only be placated by offerings of steakburgers, jalapeño poppers, moonshine, and stripteases.”

 

Carol laughed.“Good God.You’d better haunt the Academy, then.That’s the only place they’d go along with that nonsense!”

 

“It’s not nonsense!How the hell do you think I survived an overloaded course schedule, constant stress, and minimal sleep?”

 

“By fraternizing with anyone who got caught up in your orbit,” she replied without missing a beat.

 

“Okay, maybe some of that too.”

 

Carol smiled as she snuggled closer to him.“So, how was _your_ day?” she asked, giving him a chance to unburden himself.

 

“It was alright.It was just long and routine and completely devoid of naps.I was lucky Bones didn’t stop by the bridge.”The doctor would’ve needled the truth out of him and probably declared him unfit for duty.And that would’ve complicated things.

 

“What was your nightmare about?”

 

“It was just reliving everything from the conference room to the warp core, only made worse because I knew what was going to happen and couldn’t stop it.It’s retraumatization, plain and simple.The smart thing to do would be to accept that and move on.”

 

“So which part are you having trouble with, accepting it or moving on?”

 

“I’m not sure,” he answered honestly.“Both, maybe.I don’t like the fact that Khan’s on board.It makes me nervous.But I don’t want him off the ship either because then he’s out of my control.And I definitely don’t like the fact that he can get to me.I mean, it’s not like I can’t make good decisions because of him, but I do miss being able to sleep through the night.”

 

“Maybe you’ll rest better tonight.”

 

“I hope so.”He had an active prescription for a mild sedative.Maybe he’d try that.

 

“Would it help if I stayed?” Carol asked then.

 

Jim hugged her closer.“You know you can’t do that,” he replied, though he did regret that fact.“It’d be asking for trouble.”

 

“I can’t stay the whole night.But if you went to bed early, I could stay until 2100.That’s no later than I stay for dinner.”

 

She had a point there.And he would like some time with her, just snuggling and relaxing.It was something they got precious little of.“Alright.But dinner first.No sense in going to bed hungry.”

 

Carol leaned in and brushed a kiss across Jim’s cheek before gently extricating herself from his embrace and making for the replicator.Within moments, there were two plates of steak, potatoes, and honey-glazed carrots, which she placed on the table before going back to the replicator for drinks.

 

“You are a goddess among women,” Jim praised as he got up and joined her at the table.

 

“I have my moments,” she replied as she returned with two glasses of red wine.Jim let her set them down before he pulled her into a slow, sweet kiss.She melted against him and hummed a soft note of pleasure, and he took his time before letting the kiss dissolve.

 

“I’m going to miss you when you’re gone,” he murmured.

 

“Then let’s make the most of the time we have,” she answered.Tomorrow they would know what Starfleet meant to do with her.Tonight they could steal a few hours together and hopefully they’d both be better off for it.


	21. Chapter 21

It was 0830 and Jim was on the bridge again, only this time he was more rested and less ragged than he’d been the day before.Between spending time with Carol and taking the medicine he didn’t like to admit he sometimes needed, he’d managed to sleep through the night and wake up refreshed.What dreams he’d had had been vague and unmemorable, which was a good thing.He didn’t want to dwell on the psychological rumblings of his brain when he needed to focus on the day’s agenda.

 

He’d already reported to Admiral Leung.The admiral was foregoing a formal inspection in favor of getting the business of prepping the _Enterprise_ for wartime deployment started.The resupply would begin in a few hours, and once it was concluded, Carol would be transferred planetside and the _Enterprise_ would head out to the edge of the Neutral Zone to begin patrols.Jim had hoped there would be more time to rest, but tensions were high.They simply didn’t have the luxury of a few days’ liberty.

 

“Keptin,” Chekov reported suddenly from his station, “the _Retribution_ has dropped out of warp and is entering orbit.”

 

A few moments later, the gunmetal-grey hull of the ship came into view as it passed the _Enterprise_ and took up a position in front of her.The position gave Jim a full view of the _Retribution_ , and as recognition set in, he really wished he couldn’t see the ship.

 

“Oh my God,” he heard Uhura exclaim from behind him.She didn’t have much time to gape at the Dreadnaught-class ship on the viewscreen, however, because a moment later a transmission came through.“Captain Sheridan for you, sir.”

 

“Onscreen,” Jim ordered, though he was mentally kicking himself for being caught off-guard.

 

The other captain appeared on the main viewer a few seconds later.“Captain Kirk,” she greeted.“Good morning.”

 

“Good morning,” he replied.“ _Retribution_. _Vengeance_.Don’t know why I didn’t make the connection sooner.”

 

Sheridan smiled, and it seemed to Jim that it was a bit apologetic.“Yes, well, we’re hoping she won’t be the tragedy her sister was.So far, so good.”

 

“She’s still a hell of a ship,” he offered.

 

“She is indeed.I’m sure Admiral Hunter will give you the grand tour when you come over.He’d like to see you as soon as possible.”

 

And so it began, Jim thought to himself.“Of course.I can beam over with Khan in fifteen minutes.”

 

“We look forward to seeing you both.We’re in a high orbit.If you align your shuttlebay with ours, we can help tractor the commander’s fighter over.”

 

“We’ll make it happen.I’ll see you in a few minutes, Captain.Kirk out.”

 

The viewscreen reverted to the image of the hulking starship silhouetted against the orange brilliance of Aldebaran, and Jim took a breath before hefting himself out of his seat.“Spock,” he said, “you have the conn.”It was time to get this over with.He headed toward the exit, bound for the brig.

 

~~~~~~~~~

 

Khan was laying down on the bunk in his cell when he heard the brig doors hiss open.He tilted his head backward and saw an upside-down view of Captain Kirk making his way toward him.“Ah, Captain.Good morning.”

 

“On your feet,” Jim said as he worked the cell aperture to full diameter.“You’re going back to your ship.”

 

Khan arched a brow and rolled to his feet.“What, no security team?No manacles?No pulse rifles?”

 

“Shut up before I change my mind,” Kirk replied flatly.

 

He regarded the man for a moment, then stepped through the aperture.“I trust my fighter is in good hands.”

 

“We’re aligning the ships now.It’ll be tractored over within the hour.”

 

“That’s very reassuring.Thank you.”

 

Jim started walking toward the exit, ignoring the concerned looks of the security guards who clearly felt that a known felon shouldn’t be moved without armed escort, and Khan fell into step beside him.“Is it even worth refitting?” the captain asked.“It’s so damaged, it might be easier to start from scratch.”

 

“I won’t know that till I get a look at her.”

 

“That’s sure to keep you busy.”

 

“Undoubtedly. _Sarina_ is a complicated and stubborn lady, much like her namesake.I expect I’ll be working on her for at least a week.”

 

“At least it’ll keep you out of trouble,” Jim remarked.Then he paused.“Her namesake?Who’s that?”

 

Khan’s lips quirked in an almost-smile.“Sarina Kaur, 20th Century geneticist and my mother.”

 

“You named a fighter after your mother?”The judgement was palpable.

 

“If you’d ever met her, you’d understand.Even unto death, she fought to defend what she believed in.I thought it a fitting tribute.”

 

“I can’t say I blame you,” Jim said after a moment.“It’s only a matter of time before someone names a ship after my dad.”Then he seemed to recall that he wasn’t supposed to be personable where Khan was concerned.He didn’t say anymore, and the rest of the walk to the transporter room was uncomfortably silent.

 

Jim stepped onto the transporter pad with barely a glance to Khan, and the Augment took the next pad on the captain’s right.“Are we ready?” he asked the waiting transporter tech.

 

“The _Retribution_ is standing by to receive you, sir,” the tech replied.

 

“Good.Let’s get this over with.”

 

The tech’s fingers danced over the console.“Energizing now, sir.”A couple of moments later, shimmering light engulfed Khan and Jim.When it cleared, they were standing on the transporter pad of the other ship and Captain Sheridan and another officer were waiting to receive them.

 

“Captain, welcome aboard,” Sheridan said as Jim stepped down, and she extended her hand.He took it and they shook in amicable greeting.

 

“A pleasure,” Jim replied, though Khan thought that surely he didn’t mean the words.

 

“This is Lt. Murakami,” Sheridan continued, gesturing to the small Japanese woman next to her.“She’ll take you to the admiral.I’m assured that once you’ve spoken with him, there’ll be time for the traditional pleasantries, but until then, I leave you in her capable hands.” 

 

“Follow me, sir,” the lieutenant said, gesturing for Jim to come with her and leading the way out of the room.The man fell into step beside her, though Khan noticed that he didn’t relax as he put distance between himself and his former prisoner.

 

Sheridan turned to Khan then.“Welcome back, Commander.I assume you’ll want to go to the shuttle bay to oversee the transport of your fighter?”

 

“That would be my preference,” he agreed.

 

“Very well.Report to me once the transport is complete and you’ve assessed the damage.We’ll come up with a repair plan and then you can have some downtime.”

 

He nodded and stepped down from the transporter pad.“What’s the status of my squadron?”

 

“Now that you’re back, everyone’s accounted for.Operations are proceeding as scheduled.”

 

“Excellent,” he said with a smile.“I would hate for our timetable to have been affected by my absence.”

 

“Not at all, Commander.The timetable’s secure.”

 

He nodded approvingly and stepped past her, making his way out of the transporter room and down to the shuttle bay.He had work to do.

 

~~~~~~~~~

 

“So, Lieutenant,” Jim said as he walked down the corridor with the other officer.“You’re the one who responded to my message to Admiral Hunter, aren’t you?”

 

“That’s correct, sir,” she replied.“I’m the admiral’s yeoman.I handle most of his correspondence.”

 

“Even the stuff that’s sent over a coded priority channel?”That was really supposed to be eyes-only stuff.

 

“In your case, sir, he asked me to handle the response.”

 

“Oh?Why’s that?The man doesn’t dirty himself by associating with line officers?”

 

“You’ll understand when you meet him, sir,” she replied.“I’m sorry I can’t just tell you the reasons why, and I know it must be frustrating for you, but I assure you it’ll all become clear in a few minutes.”

 

“Yeah, well, so far Admiral Hunter’s not winning any points for friendliness or transparency.”

 

Murakami chuckled.“I can’t blame you for thinking that way, sir.”They walked for a few more moments before she stopped him in front of a door marked Admiral’s Suite.“This is as far as I go,” she said, and she punched an access code into the panel beside the door.

 

The door slid open, revealing an office with a large desk, a sofa, and a couple of wingback chairs.Sitting in one of those chairs was Admiral Pike.“Hello, Jim,” he said simply.

 

_I must be hallucinating_ , Jim thought to himself.He was trying to work out exactly what he should do about it when the Pike-hallucination barked out a warning and Jim suddenly found himself being supported by Lieutenant Murakami, who was surprisingly strong for barely breaking a meter and a half in height.The Pike-hallucination limped over to him and Jim found him to be distressingly solid as he helped Murakami walk him to the sofa.To his credit, the captain tried to walk there himself, but his legs weren’t nearly as cooperative as he wanted them to be.

 

“Take it easy, son, you’re alright,” the admiral was saying.“Slow, deep breaths.”He half-collapsed next to Jim then reached out to take his pulse, evidently more concerned about the younger man than he was about himself. 

 

“Did I just faint?” Jim asked incredulously.

 

“I don’t think you actually lost consciousness,” Pike answered, “but it was a very fine example of a swoon.Your heart’s racing; your blood pressure probably dropped.How are you feeling?”

 

“Fine,” he replied automatically, though in truth he felt lightheaded and confused.“I think I’m hallucinating,” he added after a moment.

 

“You’re not hallucinating,” Pike assured him.“It’s really me.I’m really here.”

 

“How?”He was dead.How could he come back to life?

 

“It’s a long story,” the admiral replied.“I’ll tell you when you’re not pale as a ghost.”

 

Murakami came back from … somewhere and pressed an open bottle of clear blue liquid into Jim’s hand.“Here, sir, drink this.”When he lifted the bottle to his lips, he tasted the cool sweetness of glucose-electrolyte solution.For blood sugar and blood pressure, some little voice in his head informed him.It’d help him recover.

 

“Thank you, Kamui,” Pike told the lieutenant.“I’ll call you when he’s ready to return to his ship.”

 

“Yes, sir,” she replied, and she made her way out of the room.

 

“She’s really strong,” Jim remarked randomly.

 

“She’s an Augment,” Pike replied.“They’re all really strong.”

 

That only served to confuse Jim more.Pike was alive.There were Augments working for Starfleet.There weren’t even supposed to _be_ Augments anymore.Just Khan and … and his crew.Realization set in as the fog began to clear.“You woke them up,” he murmured.“You woke Khan’s crew up.”

 

Pike smiled softly.“Yes, I did,” he answered.“But that’s a discussion for later.Right now, I’m sure you have a lot of questions.”

 

“You’re supposed to be dead.I _saw_ you.You were _dead_.”

 

“The med team detected intermittent life-signs and managed to resuscitate me.”

 

“Why didn’t anybody _tell_ me?!”His mind was swimming with all the ways everything could’ve been different if he’d known.

 

“Because Admiral Marcus didn’t want anyone to know,” the admiral replied.“They stabilized me at Starfleet Medical, but Marcus had someone fill out a death certificate as if I’d never been resuscitated.He had me transported to a private hospital in San Diego.It wasn’t until someone in Mortuary Services realized there wasn’t a body to go with the death certificate that Starfleet started looking for me.But by that time, everything had already gone down.The investigators assumed that Marcus faked my death because I played some integral part in his plan to start war with the Klingons.”

 

“But you had nothing to do with that!”Jim’s heart skipped a beat.“Did you?”It was a horrible, hushed thought and one he couldn’t help but have.

 

“No, I didn’t,” Pike assured him.“And that’s the conclusion Starfleet came to as well … after months and months of interrogation at a penal facility in New Zealand.That’s why I couldn’t tell you I was alive.For a long time, I didn’t have any contact with the outside world.When Starfleet realized their mistake, they gave me a new identity and a new job and I had both hands full with that for a while.I wanted to tell you.But I knew you deserved more than a comm.You wouldn’t have believed it anyway.”

 

“Damn right I wouldn’t’ve.You’re right here and I _still_ don’t believe it.”It was all quite a shock, and one he was doing his best to fight through so he could feel _something_.He took another sip of the blue stuff, then reached a hand out to take Pike’s in his, reassuring himself that the man was real.

 

Pike squeezed Jim’s hand gently.“It’ll take some time.I know that.But you’ve got my contact information now.Even after you head back out into the black, we can keep in touch.”

 

“And you’ll actually answer your own messages this time?”

 

He smiled softly.“Yes,” he replied.“I promise.”

 

“I mean, I understand why you did it, but…”A thought occurred to him then.“What about Spock?You’re going to tell him you’re alive, right?”

 

“I figured I’d call him over tonight or tomorrow.I wanted to give you all the time you needed, and he’s going to need some special care too.And I need to get in touch with Carol Marcus.Last I checked, she was stationed on the _Enterprise_.”

 

Jim ducked his head, then nodded.“Yeah,” he confirmed.“But not for long.She’s being transferred planetside in a couple of days.”

 

“Why?”

 

“She’s pregnant.”

 

“Oh really?”Pike sounded intrigued.“When did that happen?”

 

“About 23 weeks ago.”

 

“I see.And will she be taking other contributing party to said pregnancy with her when she goes?”

 

“Only if he can clone himself so he can command a starship and be a decent partner at the same time.”

 

“Ah,” Pike remarked then.Part of him was surprised.Carol wasn’t one for the sort of lacksidasical relationships that Jim preferred.Part of him wasn’t surprised at all.By all accounts, Jim had matured since the events of Khan and the _Vengeance_.Maybe he was growing up and settling down a bit.“Well, I can certainly see why you’d be preoccupied,” he continued.“She’s a lieutenant, isn’t she?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

“Well, that’s only slightly problematic.Tell you what, I’ll talk to Admiral Leung and see if I can negotiate a better assignment for her, something that would be more suited to her qualifications.That way she’d be well away from the line of battle and doing something she wouldn’t bore her to tears.And it might even come with a promotion.”

 

“Only if she’s really earned it,” Jim warned.“She wouldn’t let me speed the process along for love or money.”

 

“Don’t worry.I know Carol.I’ll find a way to make things work.”He chuckled then.“Congratulations,” he offered with a soft smile.

 

Jim found himself smiling in return at that.“Thanks,” he murmured.It was weird, but he still got a little flutter in his chest every time he realized he was going to be a father.He never thought he’d feel that way about it.And it was that little bit of feeling that broke through the numbness and let the magnitude of everything crash down on him.Pike was alive.Pike was _here_.He had his father back.He tried unsuccessfully to blink away tears, and when that didn’t work, he scrubbed at his eyes with the back of his hand.Dammit.He wasn’t supposed to cry.

 

Pike, however, seemed entirely supportive of the outburst.He took Jim’s bottle of blue stuff from him and set it on the side table, then drew the younger man into a hug and rubbed his back gently.“Sssh.It’s alright.Just let it out.It’ll make you feel better.”

 

A stifled whimper became a soft sob which became louder as Jim cried against Pike’s shoulder.Now that the emotion had overwhelmed him it was hard to stop, and after a few moments he quit trying to fight it and just rode out the storm.He didn’t even know what he was feeling.Mostly relief, but there were a lot of things that just couldn’t be named and didn’t make sense.He was angry but he had no good reason to be angry.He was worried but he didn’t know what he was worried about.It was all terribly confusing and for a moment he thought he might understand what Spock felt like when confronted with the irrational emotionality of humanity.

 

Eventually he cried himself out and snuggled against the older man to recover.Pike was still there.He was still alive.He wasn’t being a judgmental asshole like Frank would’ve been.The universe hadn’t imploded.All was right with the world.

 

“I love you,” he said after a few moments, his voice still rough from crying.“When you were dead, I regretted not telling you, so I’m telling you now.”

 

Pike hugged him closer and pressed a kiss to the top of Jim’s head.“I love you too, Jim,” he replied.“And I’m proud of you.”

 

Somehow, those two sentences made everything alright again.Jim smiled a crooked, awkward little smile and huffed out a bit of a laugh.“I’m glad, because I’ve been trying really hard not to screw up again.”

 

“You’re doing just fine, son,” Pike assured him.“Now then, do you want the story from the beginning, or start with current circumstances and work backward?”

 

“However you want to tell it is fine by me.”

 

“Alright.I woke up in an a medical unit holding cell.I had no idea where I was or what had happened….”


	22. Chapter 22

Jim returned to the _Enterprise_ feeling fifteen centimeters taller and twenty kilos lighter.The smile on his face could’ve lit up the entire engine room.He strolled onto the bridge, finding his first officer right where he’d left him in the command chair.“Spock!” he called as he crossed the length of the bridge.“Ready room!”He had no doubt that the commander would follow him, but he was still impatient as he waited for him to catch up.

 

The Vulcan appeared a few moments later, an intrigued look on his face.“Captain,” he greeted as the door slid closed behind him.“I infer that your visit to the _Retribution_ was as satisfying as it was successful.”

 

“You have no idea,” Jim replied, still smiling as he leaned against the edge of his desk.“Spock, I have amazing news for you.Christopher Pike is alive.”

 

Spock arched one eyebrow.“I assume you have compelling knowledge to bolster such a claim.”

 

“I do.I talked to him.I _touched_ him.He goes by Sean Hunter now, for reasons I’ll let him explain when you see him.He’s expecting you on the _Retribution_ as soon as possible.Plan to stay for a while.”

 

“Am I to understand that Khan’s commanding officer, Admiral Hunter, is in fact Admiral Pike?”

 

“You understand correctly,” Jim answered.“Apparently plenty of people are aware of his change in identity, but officially he’s a completely separate person — though I did harangue him a bit on his total lack of manufactured history.He says it takes time to generate that sort of thing, so I figure in a couple of years his paper trail will look like any other career Starfleet officer.Anyway, he’ll tell you everything himself.And believe me, it’s pretty fantastic, some of it.”

 

“Jim,” Spock said with a note of concern in his voice, “what evidence do you have that Admiral Hunter is telling the truth and that this is not an elaborate ruse designed to sway you emotionally?”

 

“You,” he answered simply.“He’s willing to mind-meld with you, and you can use that to determine the authenticity of his claims — though I promise you he’s telling the truth.He has no reason to deceive me.”

 

“No reason that we can currently ascertain,” Spock pointed out.“I am willing to entertain the notion that through extraordinary circumstances Admiral Pike is alive and well, however, I refuse to accept the idea at face value.It is an especially emotionally charged topic, which is precisely why we must proceed using logic as our guide.”

 

“He said you’d say something like that.”Jim’s smile had faded a bit, but it hadn’t disappeared entirely.“He also said he was worried about you.He said he was afraid he’d inadvertently done some sort of damage because he died while you were melded with him.It’s one of the reasons he’s willing to undergo another meld, to help heal what was hurt.”

 

“His concern is appreciated, though unnecessary.However, I will take his willingness to meld into consideration when I see him.”

 

“Well, you’d best get going.I’m sure he’s anxious to see you.”He suspected Spock might be a little anxious to get to the bottom of this, but he didn’t say _that_.“I’ll see you when you get back.”

 

“Yes, Captain,” Spock replied.He turned and headed toward the main corridor.Jim followed him out and made his way to the center seat.Time to turn his thoughts back toward his own ship, he thought, and he called down to the shuttle bay for a status report on the resupply process.

 

~~~~~~~~~

 

When Carol opened the door to her quarters, Jim was already there, sitting on the couch with a cup of tea in hand and another one waiting on the side table.“Well, hello,” she said with a smile as she stepped inside.“To what do I owe the pleasure?”

 

“I thought I’d stop by and bring you some good news,” he replied, reaching for the second cup of tea and offered it to her.

 

She took it and sat down next to him.“Is it about my transfer?” she asked before she took a sip.

 

“You could say that.I went to see Admiral Hunter this morning.”

 

Her eyes narrowed.“You said this was _good_ news?”Anything involving Khan’s commanding officer couldn’t be positive.

 

“It is.”He reached out and took her hand.“Admiral Hunter is Admiral Pike.Same man, just a different name.It was quite a shock to me, but he told me the whole story and I can definitely confirm that the reports of his death were greatly exaggerated.”

 

Carol cradled her cup of tea against her chest.“How could that even happen?” she asked in a hushed voice.She didn’t sound disbelieving, just mystified.

 

“It all comes back to your father.Pike meant a lot to him personally, but he knew that I would be more easily manipulated with him out of the way.So Marcus faked Pike’s death — though it was very close to not being faked at all, in all honesty.Anyway, after everything happened and Starfleet Intelligence got involved investigating Khan and Marcus and all the related conspiracies, they tracked down Pike and assumed that he had something to do with it all.They took him into custody and questioned him on every topic under the sun for months on end and finally came to the conclusion that he was an innocent bystander.But giving him his life back would’ve meant admitting to a lot of secrets Starfleet would rather keep quiet, so instead they gave him a new life, complete with all the attendant titles and privileges.”

 

“So he’s been alive all this time…”She shook her head, visibly pulling her thoughts to more important lines of questioning.“How did he come to be Khan’s commanding officer?”

 

“His new duty station is a position of some authority.He revived Khan — and the rest of the Augments — from cryosleep.Some of them work for him.Most are private citizens.Khan himself has something of an indentured servitude thing going on in reparation for his crimes — which is something I’m not sure I agree with but it is what it is.So far, Pike seems to be keeping him on a reasonably short leash.But that’s getting a bit far afield.The news as it pertains to you is that Pike’s alive, he wants to see you tomorrow morning, and he has a job in your specialty waiting for you on Earth.If you want it, that is.Which I hope you do because someone really should keep an eye on him.”

 

Carol smiled at that.“Oh, I see,” she teased him.“You want me to go and spy on him so I can feed information back to you.”

 

“And make more awesome weapons that I can test out,” he remarked with a smile of his own.“But in all seriousness, I’d rather you be on Earth with him doing what you love than be on an at-risk colony world manning an outpost that any bottom-of-the-class Academy graduate could manage.And you’d be closer to your mother in case you need help with the baby.”

 

“That’s true,” she mused.She took another sip of her tea, then leaned over and rested her head on Jim’s shoulder.“It’ll be good to see Uncle Chris again,” she said.“I’ve missed being able to talk to him.”And she could definitely use someone to talk to now that Jim was going to be in the line of fire.War had upset all her plans for having him involved with the birth and the first several weeks of life.

 

“I’m sure you’ll have plenty of time to talk to him once you’re aboard the _Retribution_.Just watch out for that yeoman of his.She’s quiet like a ninja.Snuck right up on me on the way back to the transporter room.”

 

Carol smirked at that.“Did you scream like a girl?”

 

“I can neither confirm nor deny the validity of that statement,” he replied with a little smirk of his own.

 

She chuckled.She could just imagine Jim being lost in thought and off his guard and then thoroughly startled.Oh, if only she had access to the surveillance feeds on board that ship…“So,” she asked, “how long do I have before I move?”

 

“At the rate we’re going on the resupply, sometime day after tomorrow.”

 

She nodded.“Well, I can let Scotty know not to expect me tomorrow and spend the day packing.I seem to have accumulated a fair amount of stuff since we started out on this mission.”

 

“I can help after shift’s over.And we could have dinner.And dessert,” he added with a come-hither smile.

 

She smiled and leaned up to kiss those smiling lips.“Going to loosen protocol since it’s my last night on the ship?”

 

“Well, I figure we’re in no danger of causing trouble for ourselves.You could stay the night at my place, not have to spend your last night surrounded by cargo totes.”

 

“It’s a date.”She rested her head on his shoulder again, then asked, “Did you tell Chris about us?About the baby?”

 

He hesitated for a moment, then answered, “Yeah.I figured he’d find out anyway, and I was in a confessing mood.Anyway, no one’s gonna ask him what he knows about us.He’s way too high up on the food chain.”

 

“That’s true.And I suppose it does avoid some awkwardness.I figured he’d be surprised enough to see me with a belly…”

 

“I think he was less surprised that you were pregnant and more surprised that I was the reason you were pregnant.”

 

“Yeah, your reputation definitely doesn’t match up with my tastes,” she agreed.“Good thing there’s more to you than your reputation.”

 

“Sssh, don’t say that out loud.People might start thinking I’m mature and responsible.”

 

“That’s not a bad thing to be, you know.”

 

“Yeah, but I don’t want to have to sit through more boring meetings than I have to!”

 

She shook her head, though she was smiling all the way.“You’re incorrigible, Jim.Don’t ever change.”

 

“Not planning to,” he replied.“Now then, a little bird told me that there’s a farewell reception for you in the officers’ mess in about half an hour.It would be my pleasure to escort you there.”

 

“Why, Captain, you’re just full of surprises this evening, aren’t you?”She kissed his cheek, then shifted away to set her tea aside and get up.“I would be honored.”


End file.
